This is the podcast for Held In Our Hearts. We are a local charity providing baby loss counselling and support to families, with over 40 years’ experience of offering compassionate bereavement care in the community.
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A light look at life around death. Two funeral industry employees talk about all the things that you never wanted to hear about but will be thrilled that you know!
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Episode 46 - Boat Death and the Public
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Kerry and Jeff explore getting dead people off of boats, planes and seeing the dead in the wild.Jeff & Nicole
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Episode 45 - Nathan's Hoarders and Hijinks
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Jeff welcomes Nathan R to the Cot Cottage for reminiscing. Stories and reflections from a retired removal tech.Jeff & Nicole
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Episode 44 - 4th Grader Death Ed, with Jamie S
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Jeff brings in the outsider - Testing out a new format, Jeff brings in his friend Jamie who knows next to nothing about funeral service. Let's all hope that everyone can bring the same energy and curiosity to the podcast as he does!!Jeff & Nicole
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Season 2 Episode 1? - Only Death Is Final
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Jeff and Kerry tackle reviving the show, and dangerous removals. And, a lot of back and forth about setting expectations.Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff wrap up Cot Culture in a goodbye to our listeners. Nicole is off to tackle new horizons with exciting news about chaplaincy and her path for Forget Me Not! Jeff will continue with his funeral homes with an eye to helping solve some of the region's challenges. Jeff will still monitor chatter@thecotculture.com for email, and welcomes …
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Well... we missed a week due to tech difficulties and it appears that today wasn't much better, but I turned the beautiful soufflé into a beat up diner scramble. Ok, that analogy doesn't work very well, but what could have been amazing audio is the best I could save. Thank you to Katey at Return Home for taking the time to talk with us about Natura…
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Nicole and Jeff tackle feedback from show friend Ashley - Have you done removals outdoors or in the woods. And other rambling. I'm not sure what we talked about, but I'm pretty sure it was fun and death related.Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff have the opportunity to talk with Lashanna of A Sacred Passing to hear about her work in community to make life, and death, more loving and inclusive through her education and doula work. https://asacredpassing.org/ More information about Asphodel - "A place for people to die; to gather, live, and grieve. A house for people to learn…
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Nicole and Kerry talk about what it's like being a woman in the funeral industry and some of the challenges and navigation that they need to do as a result.Jeff & Nicole
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Episode 37 - Climb up. The horse isn't dead.
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Nicole and Jeff are on a real tear today on the industry - all that's wrong and the fixes for deathcare. Or at least the soapbox had someone on it for an hour...Jeff & Nicole
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Episode 36 - Death Virginity
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Nicole and Jeff talk about: Jess- Do you work on the holidays? Is it normally busy on thanksgiving and christmas? Ashley- I want to hear about your FIRST bodies in the biz? Were they weird/interesting? Why are care centers so secure? High fences, lots of locs and codes, anything you heard about anyone through the years trying to break in and steal …
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Episode 35 - Bobble Head Movers
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Nicole and Jeff tackle some more chatter! Mike C- Cot Culture seems to imply there are things that are common among all funeral workers…and I think there probably is (like most specialized professions…eg, engineers = nerds). What do funeral home workers have in common? A fondness for The Cure or Sisters of Mercy would be my guess. Ethan B- What's t…
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Episode 34 - Set a Low Bar
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This week, Nicole and Jeff tackle: Tracy T- cont Does anyone ever ask to see their loved one unclothed to look at them one last time? Have you ever encountered an unusual otherworldly presence around in the room when you went to transport a body? Sharon B - My cousins want to mix their moms ashes with my Aunts. Is that a thing? Turtle - How do I ma…
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Episode 33 - She Likes the Cold Now
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Nicole and Jeff are putting in the work to get through some chatter! Megan C cont. - there’s a movement toward home births and deaths. Walk us through some different cultural death rituals and if we choose to keep/care for our dead at home, some practical, legal, and biological expectations. Tracy T How do you feel about cemeteries with elaborate s…
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Episode 32 - African Dreams
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Chatter- Megan tell stories about when you had concerns about cause or manner of death Chatter- Julie Have you attended or hosted a death cafe? Chatter- Pauline Have you considered talking about death to high school students? I wish I had learned more about it and all of the legal specifics in dealing with it afterwards. Also, how one can set up De…
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Episode 31 - Nicole out, Kerry in.
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While Nicole feeds elephants jumping fences, repeat guest and rockstar, Kerry steps in as guest host to cover mortuary science school and application in the real world. Thanks Kerry!Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff have a very special show - Suzy's passing was a surprise, but her family turned a removal into a surprising life event for everyone involved. We have our first outside guests on the show - Abby and Gwen join us to talk about their mom's passing and how Suzy's death and transfer transformed tragedy into something meaningful.…
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Episode 29 - It's Just Not [a good idea]
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Chatter- Shelby How do you maintain your sense of empathy as you grow in the profession? Chatter- Megan Are WA cemeteries concerned with running out of space? Chatter- Rose Now that human composting is more accepted, what do you think is the next "fringe" manner of dealing with a body that will slowly work toward being more mainstream/legal? Chatte…
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Episode 28 - It's Like Pulling Teeth
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WOW ALL THE CHATTER Chatter- Lashanna, WA Do you think WA state will ever not require cremulation? What are the first three things you do every time you go home? Are there foods that you can no longer eat because of your death work? Do you ever lie about your profession when introducing yourself? If so, what is the other profession that you tell pe…
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Nicole and Jeff beg for your chatter - ASK QUESTIONS And, Jeff gets up on the authorization soapbox as he schools us on why your self authorization is an exercise in frustration. TL:DR - Sign your own authorization. Talk to experts.Jeff & Nicole
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Episode 26 - Your Maggots Have Six Corners
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Nicole and Jeff have a hodgepodge day because we didn't have chatter! Maggot follow up with audio from Jake the Pest Man Terminology Alkaline hydrolysis Crypts/Niches Caskets/Coffins Eulogies Autopsy Shameless begging for chatter so we can do 5 episodes while vacations happen.Jeff & Nicole
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Episode 25 - The Underwear Drawer and Fence Setting
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Jeff and Nicole dive into unexpected territory with a State of the Market evaluation on the Puget Sound and corporate ownership. AND: Chatter- Valentine, WA What’s something you wish you knew before you started your job? Chatter- Sarah, WA Do you ever struggle when you have to do removals for children? Especially you Jeff now that you have Bob? Cha…
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Episode 24 - Death - It's all funny.
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Chatter- Patricia, ID What is the longest a body has gone undiscovered that you had to remove? Chatter- Sarah, AZ What do they do with the belly button after cremation? I read that the belly button does not burn to ash and that it remains hard and the same size? I have to know if this is true or not. Chatter- Jayne, Tacoma WA When did monetization …
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This week Nicole and Jeff tackle Deedles, CA - History and culture of death care. Total final evaluation, never to be discussed again. J3, WA - Funeral Food Cemetery Chairs Becoming a death doula (certification) Jan, WA - How long does it take for a body to decay in a crypt?Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff have a removal team guest! Heather, a removal rockstar, relates early horror shows and lovely cup fillers on today's episode!Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff have a repeat guest! Kerry D is back in the saddle with a couple of removal stories to whet your appetite for transfer mayhem! Nicole and Jeff discuss what makes a good funeral director.Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff talk about: Archery Hospice and Doula experience pre-death Heather in WA - Death moaning Jo in WA - What happens when they can't ID a body? What happens if there is no next of kin? Laura in WA - What is a removal vanJeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff tackle: More getting to know you AND - Chatter - Jo, WA What is your favorite fictional depiction of a death ritual or grief process? Do you have a least favorite? How often are kids present during removals? What is something that still surprises you about your work? Chatter- Heather, WA How do they autopsy the brain but keep the fa…
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Episode 18.2 - The Styrofoam of the Death World
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Third time is a charm! We have recorded this episode THREE TIMES. If you don't like this version, it's the version you're going to get. In this episode, we tackle Cremating soft tissue David, AZ - Corpses making a mess Kristin, WA - Do we believe in reincarnation? Sara, WA Can you share a story in which you thought you were going to die? Or thought…
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We screwed up. We recorded episode 18 and then deleted the file (we=Jeff), then re-recorded it and... well, you can listen to this and see what the results were. We are so sorry!! We will be back with more next week.Jeff & Nicole
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Episode 17 - Tarot, Ouija, and Meat
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Nicole and Jeff Tackle: Clean your house before you die Jayden from WA - Multiple bodies in one casket Kerry from WA - Seasonality of death Sarah from WA - Death out of area Get to know you Qs that Nicole got for us to tackle!Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff need - better show notes. But, here we are: Graves and recipes Clearing up last week's possible pre-arrangement confusion - making sure we are all on the same page about self authorization. Dan from AZ asks about police and fire roles at removals/place of death Alcohol and grief Sarah from AZ asks for suggestions for those that rece…
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Jeff & Nicole talk about: Tattoo removal/Preservation Call an attorney (estate debt) Funny family requests Removing your catheter Gen X ramblings Exhumation & DisintermentJeff & Nicole
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Episode 14 - Stitch You Up, You Furless Wonder
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Nicole and Jeff talk about: New lifts in vans! Mistakes are made. Freaking out and quitting More death industry myths Animal reactions to owner death Human taxidermyJeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff tackle, yet again, all the chatter that makes ya think. Deedles from CA asks: Have you participated in religious ceremonies pre-removal Do you ever pick up decomps or do they go to the ME? How do you take care of your mental health? Sarah in AZ asks: What wives tales or idioms have you heard that help sculpt of change your thoughts …
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Today Nicole and Jeff tackle a ton of chatter!! Thanks to Dee Dee for a host of questions, some of the topics - Transporting bits of people Washing people - when/why Makeup and hair Rigor Bugs Cremation in clothes and things to go Don't forget to email us at chatter@thecotculture.comJeff & Nicole
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Today, Nicole and Jeff invited guest Kerry Decker from CodaCare to talk about removals and her start in the profession. Also covered this episode: Types of removals and the places we go to do them Interesting removals Families and their pets Funeral industry and bodies in Hollywood What it means to be a FD and the misconceptions of FDs and Embalmer…
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Nicole and Jeff go improv with: Hoarder removals Spontaneous human combustion Covid protocols The parts of the body that gross us outJeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff cover important topics: Near death experiences One thing to prep for death USA Catacombs Least talked about dispositions Death euphemisms and celebration post-mortemJeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff talk about: Med sled stories Death Doulas What is a doula? Certification and licensure What does the doula solve/fix? Does death hurt? [spoiler: we have no idea.]Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff talk about: Military uses for the dead Viking funerals - setting fire to people on boats (bad idea) Mushroom suits Tree pods - fetal style Backyard burialJeff & Nicole
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This week, Nicole and Jeff talk about: Body donation to science The Murder Act Why the name "Cot Culture" Why embalm Promession/freeze dried dad What to do with cremated remains Keep em' coming people!Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff talk about: Follow up on body farms from Caitlin Doughty Who we want to reach with this stuff What we think you should know Hopes and fears Amazed about death processJeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff tackle: Body farms - what we (don't) know. Why Jeff fell in love. The best and worst of the industry. Midlife, what is it, and what's the crisis? Do one thing - talk to your familyJeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff tackle: Middle age groin pain Pet doula selection Pet doula tasks and support More poop We touched on pre-arrangement communication and grief management, but decided that these items need to be a show topic to themselves.Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff tackle the first chatter! Organ donation and alternative disposition Preparing a body in home to address decomposition All the decomp smells Brussel sprouts and pee.Jeff & Nicole
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Nicole and Jeff introduce themselves and touch on the following: Our backgrounds Doula roles Basic terminology Parenting PoopJeff & Nicole
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Angie chats today to Heather Taylor, our Principal Peer Supporter, who talks about her own journey as a bereaved parent to her precious daughter Eilidh, who died 26 years ago and to Mhairi Hayes, whose much loved daughter, Niamh died in early 2020. Together they reflect on the differences and similarities on the steps that they took on the road, wh…
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In this episode, Nicola talks to Heather, Lindsay and Katy who are all peer supports at Held In Our Hearts. They discuss many aspects of peer support and answer questions from the public about their role and the support they offer bereaved parents. If you have ever wondered what peer support is or have wondered if it might help you , then listen in…
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Tracy talks to Michael McQuire from Fort William and his incredible journey as a bereaved dad and how he channeled his own grief after the death of his beautiful son Kyle to support others. From setting up the charity Aman Cara and working tirelessly to fund a place that parents can go after the death of their baby. He talks about his dream to see …
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