222: Contact to Connection: Go First Networking & Follow-Up Playbook for Mom Entrepreneurs

Unimaginable Wellness For New Moms Who Are Founders, Entrepreneurs, Creators

Ever think to yourself, "Sure, I can network with strangers confidently... as long as they go first?" Do you ever wish you had the chutzpah and perfect words to break the ice as a mompreneur, even if you're introverted? Want access to my frameworks and easy-to-use follow-up insights – the exact ones I've used to land big-name podcast interviews with people like Suzy Batiz or GaryVee?

Welcome to episode 222. Bookmark this episode to learn exactly how to go first to strike a conversation with a contact and find your most authentic way to turn them into a real connection!

Free Resource: From Contact to Connection: The Go First Networking & Follow-Up Playbook for Mom Entrepreneurs

SIGN-UP for playbook: https://bit.ly/hypernetworking

• Easy to follow steps to craft your networking outreach goal • Research necessary to not ask silly questions or feel awkward • Unconventional follow-up ideas and timing that will not come across as thirsty/ pushy • Templates that you can tailor based on your business goals and personality • Worksheet to uncover ways to add value to contacts and make everyone feel good

The urgency stems from the fact that many of us, as I coach moms who are entrepreneurs, have been out of the market for a while. Some of us have taken a hiatus, perhaps due to a recent child or the pandemic keeping us home and away from others. But mompreneurs are back, and we need to catch up! This can naturally lead to a dip in confidence when re-entering the scene and engaging with people who haven't experienced a similar break. Right? That's why I wanted to equip you with some language that's practically copy-and-paste ready, like Mad Libs, allowing you to tailor it to your specific outreach goals.

So here is a real-life question that I got from a mom business owner. She said: I just got back into networking after a pause from having two kids. I don't have a problem talking to someone if they talk to me first? It's usually the opening, the conversation with a stranger, that isn't about the weather or something irrelevant. And then after the meeting, I want to know what to say afterwards to follow up with a give and not just "taking".

Tune in for my answer to her question, which I suspect is on your mind too, if you're reading this. And while you're here, grab this free resource I made specifically for my fellow mompreneurs, founders, and creators who need to be more strategic about their networking efforts. These skills can take your business to the next level, whether you're looking to find new partners, build corporate relationships with decision-makers, secure podcast guests, or find mentors who can open doors to the right rooms – where the real conversations happen and where, if mentioned, you could transform your vision.

TRANSCRIPT

Now before I answer that question, I just need to ask you, like, do you have outreach goals as a business owner? Because if you don't, I think we just need to like level set right there. Here's where I'm going with this right now in my nine week group coaching program, fertile imagination in access, which is what I'm going to rename it from action.

What we're going through is how to actually knock your business goals out of the ballpark, right? So let's just imagine that you want to bring in an extra 50 K and you're figuring out how to engage with the right stakeholders, be in the right rooms, have the right conversations. That is what needs to happen.

You need to really be specific. Like who do you want to talk to? And to be very honest, you could absolutely use AI and get some ideas, but coming from someone who tried that pertaining to just pitching podcasts, for example. AI wasn't as helpful as I had hoped. It really is something that requires your own personal touch because you're going to have the wisdom necessary to understand how can I look through LinkedIn, for example, for precisely the person I need on my team or I need to speak to.

So have an outreach goal. That's like step number one. And that is where I come in and I support mom entrepreneurs who may have never approached their business in this way, through the use of hyper networking, which I'll get into in this episode. Now let's go back to the language that this person might use in order to strike up a conversation with a complete and total stranger.

So let's imagine that you are, On LinkedIn, right? So that's one way that you're conducting this outreach efforts in order to build strategic partnerships or find mentors who are light years ahead of you, not individuals where you feel like you both are in the same boat. And just kind of feeding each other information that you've gotten online.

So here's one way that you might want to approach this. So as this person is sharing, she wants to get back out there. It's been some time. Step one is you need to know who you are. Like you need to realize and rebuild your confidence, right? Like, who are you to talk to person A, B, or C? So as an example, let's imagine that you wanted to get in touch with Sarah Blakely.

Now, I'm not saying you have to talk to someone that is a billionaire or someone that might feel so out of reach at first. There is a way to build up your confidence to get to that level, but here's the reality of it. Someone like Sarah is getting all these inbound LinkedIn messages that are totally ridiculous.

A lot of them are like copy and paste pitches, invest in my business, or, Oh, I admire you so much. Can I work for you for free? Like these are the sort of messages someone like Sarah is getting. So if you are genuine, sincere, and you honestly approach someone like Sarah, and then of course, there's other things that need to happen to get her attention.

Then you will stand out. That's just like the first step there, right? So step one, what's your intention? I think intention really matters. So before you put pen to paper or fingertip to keyboard, definitely, what is your intention, right? Are you looking for a relationship with someone like a Sarah or whoever, Whereby you really want to not just take from them, but you want to give them a sense of like either admiration, appreciation, or just like a real conversation.

I know this might sound like not of value, but do you know how valuable it is to have a real conversation with someone who gets pitched all the time and you're there being yourself and you're there being your mom self? Like. I tell my clients all the time, let's imagine you wanted to engage with Warren Buffett, right?

You're not a billionaire. Okay, fine. You're not Warren's cousin or nephew or son, but imagine that there was like a baby in a room. Tell me that that baby is not going to make someone like Warren Buffett giggle and tell me that just providing an opportunity for Warren to giggle is not a value. Like really, really take that in.

Like someone who is pitched all the time by disingenuous people. Is actually having a real chat with someone that's like a mom who gets the struggle, who gets how hard it is to pursue her outreach goals or her business goals. So really figuring out like who you are and the value that you bring to the table upfront before typing anything is step one.

And it's really hard for moms because a lot of the value that we might bring to a conversation with someone who has these financial markers of success, a lot of the value that we bring is not quantifiable. It really isn't. And so it's really on us to reimagine what actually matters in terms of like authentic human engagement.

So that's the first piece of the puzzle. The second one is the following. So if you're reaching out to someone, what's really, really important, and I'm thinking LinkedIn, because that is how I helped a client just yesterday. But if you're reaching out to someone, you need to understand, like, why exactly are you reaching out to them?

And we've got to cut through the bullshit, like for real, for real, for real. Why are you reaching out to that person? Okay, because if there's any sort of like hint or tint of I just want to reach out to you because I want you to give me money, like someone's going to smell that on you, even though you can't technically smell LinkedIn, but they're just going to tell like certain phrases that you might use will feel kind of like icky or weird or whatever.

So you got to be really like clear on what, like why are you reaching out to this person? So let me give you an example, let's imagine that like legit, you want someone to be on your board of advisors, like strategically, that is something that you can bring to the table. If you're having a conversation with one of these very amazing human beings.

It might not even be someone that's like billionaire light years ahead of you. It might be someone who just has visibility into a new sector that might help you achieve your outreach goals, i. e. your business goals. So in the case of my client just the other day, for her, she really wants to reach out to people that are in the health insurance space, right?

And what was really interesting is that she has a board of advisors. She has a board of advisors and she knows that she needs someone who is a medical professional. So what is it that she did or I guided her to do? I said, okay, great. So name a health insurance company, whatever it might have been in her case, it was Kaiser Permanente.

And now tell me the actual job title of the person who's a medical professional that you feel would be like the perfect bulls eye pick to serve on your board. Now, I didn't connect those dots up front, but after the fact, that's where I said we were going. Here's the thing. People like to feel special.

Everybody has an ego. And if you have an opportunity to really cater to someone's ego, like let's say you have a podcast, let's say you have a blog, let's say you have a vlog, a YouTube channel, or A board of advisors, or you could like literally make it up and say, and now I have a board of advisors and a spot that's enough of a reason for someone and you to engage.

Right? So that's what we did. We're like, okay, great. So let's be real specific here. So you want to have a relationship with someone at Kaiser Permanente and you want it to be a, and it's so hard for me to say this, a neonatologist person. Right? Right. So that's what we did. He was like, all right, let's find exactly the bullseye target that we would like to engage with.

And the invitation would be to serve on the board. That's not what you say out of the gate. Instead, what you might say out of the gate is the following. So you're looking at someone's LinkedIn profile and you're saying to yourself, okay, this person, I don't want them to ignore my connection requests, right?

So that means that you have to write an actual note. And that's probably obvious, but what do you put in that note? So you got to lead with something that is like about them. If you start with the, thank you for your time, happy to connect. Saw you the other day. That is so boring. I want you to connect with someone and say, Hey, I saw that you are a Neo blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Cause it's hard for me to say. And I noticed that you have spent some time in the ex care unit, right? So this is all based on. What someone writes in LinkedIn, or I noticed that you are a, and you could name the job function if you want to make it really easy on yourself. And I noticed that you went to Berkeley, which is definitely a place where women's rights was really like.

Top of mind, right? So you got to make it specific. It's like, no, this person isn't like making a mistake and reaching out to me. They actually want to talk to me because I very specifically have a certain experience or I wrote something in my LinkedIn profile that this person read. So if you up front in your LinkedIn outbound first connection, say that, that's going to automatically get someone's attention, right?

And then when you could say, as an example, so you're saying like, Hey, essentially you're saying I am reaching out because you are this based on your experiences in that it leads me to believe that you might be interested in a conversation pertaining to this other topic, whatever that topic is pertaining to your outreach goal.

And your company vision next sentence would be something like, I felt encouraged to reach out to you because that's another way that you might want to lead. Right? And again, you're saying exactly what you're reading on LinkedIn, right? Or maybe you heard a podcast where they were on, or maybe you saw them in the media.

So that's actual language you could use to strike up a conversation that has zilch to do with the weather. All right, great. So now you have this like first point of connection. And so someone accepts the connection. Then what? Here's the reality of it. Chances are, although you wrote that information in LinkedIn, that person didn't read it like with any sort of level of depth.

So they might not respond to that initial like three sentences outbound. But if they connected, what I suggest you do is go on to LinkedIn, go into their contact info and specifically email them. Okay. Here's why, why do people go on LinkedIn? They're looking for business relationships. They're looking for a job right now.

We're all mom entrepreneurs. So what's important is that you reach them somewhere that they're actually checking all the time, which is email. So you are going to email them. Follow up. So then the follow up might be as simple as, thank you for the connection, and you might wanna like say a little bit of what you said in that original note.

The reason why I reached out to you was A, B, or CI would love to have a conversation with you. Here's my calendar. And then of course, if you wanted to, you could say, having been at the helm of my business, we've been able to do this, whatever that is, bring millions of dollars in donation or sell all these different charge keys.

But what we're looking for right now is a thought leader who can add. Some sort of fresh insights in the medical community who would be interested in learning more about organization and potentially serving on our board, which has a minimal, minimal, minimal level of time requirements, right? So you might literally go ahead and start painting the picture, nothing about the weather there, right?

So that might be the next step. And here's the thing you're putting your link. To your calendar what I noticed if you're not confident in making the first step from a networking perspective you tend to put extra steps in front of you and that irritates me beyond belief like I would only put extra steps in front of me if I'm nervous like Sean was saying you're not going to Crazy, right?

So if I'm talking to someone and like, I don't really, really, really want them to email me back because I'm scared, then yeah, I won't put my calendar link. I'll be like, maybe you'd like to connect with me, let me know. But if I really, really, really, really am clear on. My outreach goals, my company vision and who I really am and how I could add value irrespective of the human being I'm talking to, then I'm just going to cut to the chase because that's what you really, really want.

And what I have noticed is the higher you go up in job titles and levels of seniority, the faster those individuals are to just jump on the phone and get to the point. Right? It's not about being too direct or being presumptuous. You could absolutely in that second note say, I understand you're busy and you are under no obligation to respond, but I wanted to just ask you because I felt like I had to.

My mission is that important and I know that There must be alignments or synergies. You could literally say this, like, it is okay to wear your heart on your sleeve. Again, all of this is assuming that you really want to talk to this person and you have a very specific ask in your mind. If you don't have a specific ask in your mind, this is what I suggested my client do the other day.

She brainstorms a bunch of reasons, a bunch of ways that. The person she connected with, this was her follow up strategy, could actually work with her, how she could help that person, how that person can help her, and how together they're better off, let's imagine, right? Not necessarily in those words, but she had to brainstorm this, so do yourself the favor of preparing, brainstorming.

On that note, I want to help you. With a great deal of specificity, I want to be sure that you have the actual language you need to have conversations with people that might intimidate you, right? And so what you will find, and you could absolutely see in the show notes, is Is a link, it is bit. ly, so bit.

ly forward slash hyper networking, you can actually go to that link and you can download for free a playbook in this playbook. What I have done. Is really tried to make this like plug and play pertaining to those like first outbound connections. It is called from contact to connection. It's the mompreneurs followup playbook.

And I give you my exact networking language in terms of the emails that you could send out the DMS that you could put in and even openers for cocktail parties. So you know how you're like in a cocktail party. And then people are like in these circles that seem Impenetrable. Well, you can absolutely like join in those circles.

Okay. Unless you're noticing that like people are like super, super tight and like blocking you from every direction. There are ways for you to insert yourself into existing conversations. And so I've included in my playbook, a couple of ideas as well, but I don't want to overwhelm a mom entrepreneur. I just want to be sure that you have some language.

That will get you from feeling intimidated to totally excited about talking to strangers because the generosity of strangers is a real thing. So go ahead and pick up the playbook. It is again called From Contact to Connection, The Mompreneur's Follow Up Playbook. You can pick it up on the link that is in the show notes, wherever it is that you're listening to this episode.

Bitly, so bit. ly forward slash hyper networking. It will be in the show notes and you can pick it up for free today and absolutely have some language that you can use and edit pertaining to your outreach goals, pertaining to your company vision for this very year so that this way you don't have to feel like people have to talk to you first.

Because here's what happens. If you're the one to initiate a conversation, it puts you in a position of power. It's been said the person that actually like creates the agenda in like a networking meeting or any meeting, that's the person that's controlling where this conversation gets to go. So if you have the chutzpah, the confidence to actually go first during networking, engagements, then it is a hundred percent better for you because then you get to lead where the conversation goes.

And notice, I didn't say anything here about the weather at all. Like, let's, let's go to this other topic. So let's say that you want a little bit of help pertaining to Having a conversation in a live setting, a live setting. Again, I will have some language for you, for a mom business owner specifically, because I'm a mom.

I'm an entrepreneur and I a hundred percent know what it is to be. What is, is, what is the word? I don't know why it's escaping me. Not undervalued, but like people just don't expect me. And I'm little too. People don't expect me to have the audacity to go up to like the people that are on panels or the speakers at the end of an event.

So people just don't assume that I'm going to go and just like go in for the, for, for the quote unquote kill. Right. In a very positive way. So that is why I wanted to have this playbook for, for us, for mom entrepreneurs, because I'm going to tell you If you have decided to nurture a human being, Through any method, be it adoption, birth, be it as this loving and doting like auntie, like you've got, you've got guts beyond, beyond other people, like to take in like another human being and to like help them grow is one of the most courageous things.

I mean, it's the most courageous things. I've ever done personally, and let me be honest, I've got to ask for that courage every single morning, right? So, for us to be held out of these right rooms, right conversations, and right contacts, I'm gonna call bullshit on that, and I want Us as mom entrepreneurs who have had to like start, stop, pause businesses to catch up and exceed outpace anyone who didn't have to step out, pause, or iterate based on growing or having a family.

So that's why I want you to pick up that playbook today. Go to bit. ly forward slash hyper networking. Okay. So then now you're in a live networking event. And here's the thing, I was having this conversation with a mom who has a product. And I asked her, I was like, right now you and I are on a 15 minute zoom conversation.

So you just said that you are not so into networking, which I don't know. I had to ask, I was like, well, what do we call this? Like I had reached out to her. I didn't know her. She didn't know me. And we're on zoom in my mind. I'm networking in her mind. It's connecting. And I don't see it as so different when you're in a happy hour setting or you're in a venue with a lot of people.

So let's just get to that place, right? One to many networking. You're at an event. I'm thinking to myself when I went to Podfest actually in Orlando, Florida. So. For me, I get off the plane, I'm a mom, I have three kids who are at home, I gotta make this count. Like, my husband is on call for childcare, I spent a lot of money to get to Florida, and it's time away from my kids.

So how can I make this count? The moment I stepped into Florida, or landed, I just started networking. I will be networking on a plane if that is okay. I have an opportunity for me and I have, I've actually gotten a podcast guest on a plane. So beyond that, let's imagine that now you're going to an event, you're there and it's like a bunch of people, it's buzzing and people have already established their like circles, right?

Impenetrable circles. So what is it that I did that has nothing to do with the weather? Well, I approached a group of individuals who I thought were part of a meetup for authors. That's just what was on the schedule, so I was like, oh, maybe they're the meetup for authors. Here's where the really big point of differentiation is.

I approached that group of total and complete strangers already having conversations. And I said, hi, my name is Melissa. You guys look like you're having a really interesting conversation. Is this the author meetup group? Now that was like an honest question, but thinking back, maybe I could have made that up as an excuse to start.

Engaging with these humans turns out this was not the author meetup group. I could have been like bright red tail between my legs. Oh my God. Oops. I'm sorry. Bye. But I said, you know what? No, there is value in conversations with every single human being. This happened to be the group of neurodivergent podcasters.

And so for me, I was like, Oh, this is really cool because I strongly believe that I can learn brand new things and apply them to my business from people who have done things differently, especially if you think differently than me, as an example. So I was like, Oh, I'm sticking around. And then of course, I started talking to the different individuals who bring a completely fresh way of looking at the operations of business, of making marketing simple.

And as I was having conversations, the group kind of like fizzled out and so it was just me and one other person who happens to be neurodivergent. And so I was just asking her questions. Be curious. It is okay. This person was also a mom. So that's a shared experience for us. But what was not shared was that she had an approach to marketing that was super, super linear.

And I was like, Oh my God, this is like mana from the heavens or mana from the heavens. So I just asked for more information around that. What's the point? Here's the point. The excuse that I had was not something that was inauthentic or a lie or anything that was like, Oh, I'm here to just take information from you.

The excuse was like legitimate. It was like, no, no, no. I'm literally here to talk to the author meetup group. And that's okay. And I want you to feel so confident and bold in who you are and the value you bring to the table by way of your personality, your life experiences, to have the audacity to be real.

I think that is how you build the confidence to go first in a networking conversation. Again, you will want this playbook. It is in the show notes. Absolutely. Grab it immediately. So you have a better sense of the openers that you can use, whether you are online or whether you are offline, right? In this universe, it is so important to gather as much power as humanly possible.

And one way is by actually Going first, you want to set the agenda. You want to establish who gets to go in your room. You want to establish where the conversation goes and how you would like to follow up. There's so much that's not within our control that as a mom entrepreneur, you have got, you have got, and I feel like repeating this a thousand times.

You have got to find ways to set up. This game in a way that you're going to win, right? And this is one way, this is one way. Has this ever gone wrong? Hell yeah, it's gone wrong. Let me give you an example. I was in Australia pre pandemic. We were living there for three and a half years. And I remember. I was at an event where there was this leader of an organization that is for authors, right?

I'm not going to name the organization because someone from Australia might be listening, but the CEO of this organization, I wanted to talk to her. And so I was part of the crowd and I went up to her, and I don't know if she was like on her way to the bathroom, but Who cares, right? Like as a mom, we have all held our pee.

So I went up to her and she was surrounded by some other people, but who cares? Because again, I know that I have value to contribute. As an example, I have a podcast. I could have her as a guest. That's an example. And so she was trying to escape, not just me, but like the whole crowd. But then I was like, Hey, my name is Melissa.

I really love what you do. And I would love to have a conversation with you. And what she went and attempted to do was pawn me off to her assistant. So, how is this going first gone wrong? Well, because if I were to say, oh, okay, I'll talk to your assistant, then that puts me at the same level as everyone else who's trying to reach out to her.

Like this person who's the actual decision maker and actual human bullseye target I wanted to talk to. To actually just suggest that I talk to her gatekeeper. You see how that takes me away from my outreach goal. Okay. So what did I do? I said, Oh no, no, that's okay. I wanted to speak to you. See, I know that takes guts.

That takes, that takes confidence. And like I said, I think she was off to the bathroom, but for me, it just establishes the idea that no, if you want to talk to some, some, some person that might feel out of reach, like be clear on why you want to talk to them and why you deserve to talk to them and how it can be a positive outcome for the two of you.

Okay. Be clear on those things so that you have the guts to just step through the BS that might be thrown at you. If you're trying to talk to a specific person. So, did it go wrong? It did! Like, the pandemic happened afterwards anyways, so we were all distracted, but ultimately, if I really wanted her on my podcast, I certainly would have made the ask, but once I noticed that she was also, like, more soundproofed, How can I say this?

An employee, as opposed to an entrepreneur or founder. I realized that her incentives and her, her motivations might not be in alignment with my own, right? So if someone's the employee of an organization, they might not be as open to being a podcast guest on someone that they don't know, right? Cause there's a lot at stake in terms of.

Stakeholders and blah, blah, blah. That's what I've noticed. But if they're a founder, if they're an entrepreneur, if they're someone that own the business, then they get the hustle. They get it. They get it and they're all for it. Okay, let me stop. Can you tell I'm like crazy excited about this? I really, really am.

But what I want more than anything else is for you, mom, entrepreneur, mom, founder, mom, creator to go to my link and get the actual playbook, right? It'll include, like I said, some language that you can use and also some followup strategies as well. B I T dot L Y forward slash hyper networking. Can I just say something to be super, super honest?

I suspect that some moms who have businesses already, I really suspect that, and it would be so amazing if you shared this with one mom friend who has a business, one mom friend who you believe in so much, who you think has so much to offer that might just not be comfortable making the first move in a networking conversation.

So please share this episode specifically with that mom. I would be so, so, so appreciative. And thank you for listening to Unimaginable Wellness. I really do appreciate you. And damn, I believe in you so, so, so, so, so, so much. So grab the playbook. It's my free gift for being a beautiful listener and for being a mom.

You're freaking courageous as heck. So absolutely enjoy the playbook.