242: Stepping off the 'relationship escalator' (ft. Amy Gahran)

Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women

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1y ago 1:06:10

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When it comes to dating, relationships, and sex, there's a strong cultural norm -- the plotline of what we're "supposed" to want. It goes like this: You start dating, become sexually exclusive, get engaged, get married, buy a house (with a white picket fence!), have kids, and stay together until you die. No sex, dating, or romance with anyone else, ever.

This is known as the "relationship escalator," and it can sometimes feel like the only choice out there.

But what if you got off the escalator? What about the many relationships that fit outside that norm? What if, for example, you want to have kids but your partner doesn't -- and instead of breaking up, you and a close friend become co-parents?

Amy Gahran has interviewed hundreds of people who've gotten off the relationship escalator and are engaging in creative relationships of all kinds. If you've ever wondered what else was possible, you'll want to listen to this.

Memorable quotes from this episode:

"More is possible."
"You have options. And even if you want to keep doing what you're doing, make it a conscious choice."
"Cultivate the skill to re-negotiate because I can guarantee that at some point you're going to need to."

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Amy's site: https://offescalator.com/

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