Safeguarding the Self: How Avoidance Protects Us—and How to Reconnect with Authentic Agency

The Light Inside

In this episode of The Light Inside, host Jeffrey Biesecker delves into the concept of avoidance as an emotional coping strategy. He discusses how unresolved psychological issues can inhibit emotional regulation and self-awareness, leading to unprocessed trauma that affects our relationships with ourselves and others. The episode explores the subtle ways avoidance influences our reactions and highlights the challenges and transformative potential of facing what we have long avoided.

Listeners will gain insights into strategies for gently confronting avoidance patterns without feeling overwhelmed, paving the way for deeper connections and personal growth. Tune in to discover how confronting avoidance can illuminate your path to healing.

Timestamps

[00:02:54] Avoidant coping and emotional attunement.

[00:06:01] Avoidance as a survival strategy.

[00:08:07] Hypervigilance as a baseline.

[00:12:20] Evolution of avoidance strategies.

[00:16:47] Emotional capacity and discomfort.

[00:20:49] Co-regulation and emotional connection.

[00:26:00] Vagal breaking and safety.

[00:28:48] Over-intellectualizing vs. under-feeling.

[00:32:36] Somatic responses to anxiety.

[00:39:15] Guilt, shame, blame cycle.

[00:40:42] The nature of change.

[00:45:45] Exploring unconscious beliefs and triggers.

[00:49:23] Positive vs Negative Beliefs.

[00:54:01] Somatic signals and identity.

[00:57:21] Bridging somatics and cognition.

[01:00:56] Finding the grounding point.

[01:05:20] Avoidant behaviors and their roots.

Credits

• Host: Jeffrey Besecker
• Guest: Brianna Sanborn
• Executive Program Director: Anna Getz
• Production Team: Aloft Media Group
• Music: Courtesy of Aloft Media Group

Connect with host Jeffrey Besecker on LinkedIn.

Building Emotional and Somatic Language: Learning to Understand Your Body and Feelings

In this course, Brianna guides you in identifying the emotional and somatic language that bridges your inner experience with clearer self-understanding. You’ll discover how emotions first surface in the body, why they can feel confusing without words to name them, and how to communicate your feelings more effectively with yourself and others. With practical tools for recognition, regulation, and safe exploration, this course helps transform overwhelming sensations into empowering clarity. Note: Some exercises may stir strong emotions—practice at your own pace and lean on support if needed.