254. Help Me Get Over The Pervert Hump

Topic Lords

Lords:

• Ryan
  • https://www.instagram.com/ryanikeaudio/
• Alicia

Topics:

• How do I ask people what they're into without sounding like a pervert?
• Arctic Expeditions and the stupid beauty of man's hubris
• Asterix Park
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parc_Astérix
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KK3Yr80lPOY
• I Won't Call You Pretty, by L.E. Bowman
  • https://media24.fireside.fm/file/fireside-uploads-2024/images/3/3597ddeb-e52e-4cda-a59c-c64600489fea/tghmy9KF.png
• I sent this poem to my wife and she immediately responded by writing one addressed to me that was just as good, so, that's the person I married.

Microtopics:

• How to work as a freelance creative without burning yourself out.
• The me who comes up if you google me.
• The black egg who knows all.
• A huge egg with a second smaller egg in it.
• The chickens who got no credit for inventing the Matrioshka doll.
• Pluto: still a planet, because a dwarf planet is a kind of planet.
• Team Moon.
• Ancient Occult Magicks that you can check out from the library.
• Giving up on the fairy smut everyone is recommending because it isn't smutty enough.
• The air I just breathed.
• One of my Top 5 Zeldas.
• How many goes you get at being alive.
• Luring Moongrum into the rolling boulder trap.
• Bracing to hear about some online stuff.
• Conference season in the game industry.
• Meeting someone at a conference and asking them a question that Black Philip would ask.
• How to Unfuck your Sales.
• Content you Enjoyed.
• Who are the coolest hangs in game dev?
• Working with people you know and trust.
• The Pervert's Mound.
• Imagine if I was cool.
• Wearing a sandwich board with the word "MONOGAMY" on it so the woman you're talking to knows you're not hitting on her.
• Refusing to answer random innocuous questions so that it's not a tacit admission of guilt when you refuse to discuss an accusation.
• Birthday bookshop tours.
• Climbing as an act of disrespect to the mountain.
• The HMS Terror and the HMS Erebus.
• Peak British Colonialism.
• Ignoring the locals' advice about what parts of animals to eat.
• Sledging around your silverware.
• Getting lead poisoning from the canned food you brought with you to find the Northwest Passage.
• A cool pantsless mummy.
• Paradoxical Undressing.
• Having a hard time climbing Mount Everest because the path is choked with corpses of white people who blew it.
• Oops, All Antarctic Ship Crashes.
• Getting excited about bookshelves again.
• Stepping forward into whatever the next grift is going to be.
• Asterix the Gaul.
• Localizing a book that is full of puns to dozens of different languages.
• Not getting jokes in the English version of the Simpsons because the Swedish version of the Simpsons uses a completely different set of pop culture references.
• What would an Asterix theme park look like?
• Riding in a big inner tube down the lazy river.
• Elder Millenials learning about Skibidi Toilet.
• Asterix Park is the world's 12th largest economy.
• My brain beans are really getting steamed, here.
• Building an empire on that mustache.
• Watching POV rollercoaster videos with your five year old.
• Refusing to get in the sea.
• Going up to strangers and asking what percentage of the sea is fish piss.
• Weekend at Bernie's-ing your friend's corpse to Asterix Park.
• What style of underwear Zeus is wearing today.
• Who makes Zeus's underwear?
• Eating the boar sandwich at Asterix Park.
• Tasting the terror sweat on the wild boar you just hunted down.
• The little bald kid from the comics page has a theme park??
• Pirates of the Carabiner.
• Sailing through a diorama.
• The theme park ride with the sudden drop into a pool of mercury.
• The Haunted Garfield Theme Park.
• DeFuncoland.
• Jon trying to get with the veterinarian lady he's into and Garfield ruining it.
• Let's-plays as a service.
• You won't believe what happens when these Muppets swarm Treasure Island.
• A movie recap that is 80% of the length of the movie.
• Flirting tricks.
• The violence of being struck by Cupid's arrow.
• Complimenting someone on something they have no control over.
• Good luck getting any continuity out of me!

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