The Thanksgiving Table and Conflict

Open Door

After an introduction of Katie Neely, Tara Havely, and Kevin Huggins by Matt Scheuneman, the four jump into talking about relationships with others around the holidays.

Kevin expresses that conflict in a family is not necessarily bad, it's just part of the relationship. He goes so far to say that conflict can show you're doing something right, not something wrong; it shows that the relationship matters to you, or you wouldn't speak up. He brings up James 4.

Tara responds to Kevin's words by sharing some tools to help you deal with conflict leading up to it, and questions to ask yourself before engaging. Katie jumps in and says that it's important to know yourself and know if you tend to avoid conflict or what your conflict style is. Kevin gives a great example of asking himself "What's my goal?" before starting the conflict with someone, and Katie gives an example of a time where she stepped away for 20 minutes during a conflict so she could come back in the right frame of mind.

Katie starts the conversation about righteous conflict and when that is appropriate. She references a verse in Romans that tells us to live peaceably with each other, but also says that sometimes the most loving thing we can do for someone is to start a conversation that might lead to conflict, if we make the conversation about caring about their wellbeing. She makes the distinction of fighting with someone and fighting for someone.

In their final thoughts, Tara reiterates that conflict can be a great opportunity if we let it, Katie encourages listeners to be courageous and speak in grace and truth, and Kevin reminds us to use the example of Jesus.

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