Emunah Chinuch

Living Emunah By Rabbi David Ashear

Rav Moshe Feinstein, zatzal, writes in his sefer , Igrot Moshe , that the main stress of a parent when it comes to chinuch of children should be in emunah in Hashem. The children should be taught that everything they get is a present from Hashem. Then, they'll develop a love for Hashem as well as their parents who are Hashem's messengers to give them. And then they'll listen, with love, to whatever their parents tell them to do because they will know that's what Hashem wants from them. And perhaps we could add, when a child develops a love for Hashem, the child will be able to trust Hashem when he doesn't get what he wants. And he'll also be happy to sacrifice for Hashem when the time calls for it. A parent has the ability to train his child to always be happy, no matter what situation the child is in, if he could successfully train him with the proper emunah. I heard a story about a certain boy's elementary school in Bnei Brak whose principal promised them a special trip for whoever would be an excellent student for an entire month. The day came for that trip and the children were so excited to go. They were going to go to a certain lake and swim there, and it was known to be a very fun place. When they finally arrived, the principal went to pay and he heard a lot of noise coming from the lake. He saw there were girls there already. The rabbi told the attendants of the lake that they booked this lake, and they said they needed privacy. The attendants said yes, they were going to tell the girls to stay on one side and give them the other side. The rabbi said that was unacceptable. The attendants apologized and said there was nothing else they could do, the other group had just arrived a half hour before. The rabbi got back onto the bus and told the children what was going on and they became very upset when they heard. They all began complaining, saying they earned the trip and they didn't want to leave. The rabbi didn't know what to do. There were no other options. Suddenly, the quietest boy from the sixth grade asked the rabbi if he could have the microphone to speak to everyone. The rabbi gave it to him and he said, “Listen everyone, why are we not going to the lake right now? Because we are following what Hashem wants from us. We should feel so proud of ourselves for doing the will of Hashem. Let's all sing Ashrenu, ma tov chelkenu .” And he started singing the tune, and the entire bus began singing louder and louder, and they traveled back to Bnei Brak happy with their avodat Hashem rather than crying over the missed trip. The rabbi was so impressed with this boy. He called the boy's mother to tell her what he did and then asked her if she herself trained her children this way. She said that recently, they traveled for a very long distance to do certain errands and they were out in the heat for a long time. Before they were going to head back and catch the bus, the children asked if they could each buy a cold drink. The mother, seeing how hot the children were, allowed all six of her children to pick out a drink from the store and they all got the same drink which was quite expensive, especially on their tight budget. On the bus, before they started drinking, one of the children noticed that there was an ingredient that many hashgacha agencies did not approve of and only a couple would actually give hashgacha to it. The mother, seeing how badly they wanted that drink, told them, “You could rely on the hechsher to drink if you really want, but if you want to be strict and not drink it, it would make Hashem so proud of you and He would surely give you many berachot .” The oldest child said, “I'm not going to drink it,” and each of the children followed. When they got home that night, she told her husband what their children did. He was so proud of them. They all started dancing to that song, Ashrenu , ma tov chelkenu . The father made them all feel so special and said, “You should all be proud of yourselves for bringing so much satisfaction to Hashem.” He also told them he was going to take them to the store so they could each buy a special candy for what they did. This is how this boy learned to have that attitude. And that inspiration that he got was used to inspire dozens of other children that day when they couldn't go to the lake. With the right chinuch , a child could always be happy, as well as feel accomplished knowing that he is bringing satisfaction to Hashem.