A Theology That Includes Tears

Lisa Harper's Back Porch Theology

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Today’s conversation on Back Porch Theology is a vulnerable one y’all because we’re tiptoeing into the theology of tears. Crying used to make me uncomfortable. There was so much anger and chaos and sadness in my early childhood before my parents divorced that I subconsciously began using my blanket as a mini cape and tried to be Little Miss Sunshine. The way I figured it, my poor Mom and Dad already had their hands full of so much hard stuff they needed a daughter who was a self-sufficient smiler, not some needy crybaby. I was well into adulthood before I finally understood that my childish conviction that sad equals bad was way off base. Because sincere tears are God’s gift to express emotion where words fail. Those tiny rivers of salt coursing down our cheeks can help wash the debris of spent sorrow from our weary souls. They can even carry big balloon bouquets of sheer joy. And biblical narrative is quite literally soaked with tears. Ruth wept after her husband died and at the idea of being separated from her mother-in-law Naomi, Hannah wept because she was brokenhearted over her infertility, of course Job cried out to God over the death of his children and employees, along with the catastrophic loss of his health and wealth, Jeremiah wept so often over how the Israelites had forsaken the unconditional love of God and were foolishly looking for love in all the wrong places that he became known as the “weeping prophet,” the Psalmists were nothing if not emotionally vulnerable and the Sons of Korah – who were ancient worship leaders – even exclaimed that tears had become their food, Peter wept bitterly when he realized Jesus was right the night before when He soberly declared Pete would betray Him three times before the rooster crowed the following morning, an unnamed woman in the Gospels was so overwhelmed by the kindness and accessibility of Jesus that she washed His feet with her tears, and our Savior himself shed tears during His earthly life and ministry. One of my favorite writers Charlotte Bronte put it this way, “I believe while I tremble, I trust while I weep.” The bottom line is grief is not ungodly and is rather, biblically defensible as well as modeled by the Messiah Himself. We hope today’s conversation might be the beginning of real healing for some of you precious saints who’ve been bottling up your sorrow for far too long – likely with good intentions, or at the very least the goal of not being a burden to anyone else. So please grab your favorite beverage, your Bible and maybe a box of tissues and then scooch your chair right up next to ours on this big, ol’ porch where you don’t have to pretend like you’re okay when you’re not.