Episode 608: L.A. Fires Idiots On Parade, The Too Ugly For TV podcast

42:45

00:00 Introductions 03:30 Morgan Wallen 06:27 Pete Hegseth 12:16 Tariffs! 17:53 Tush Push 29:00 Pat McAfee 37:06 Cory Booker 41:00 Quittin’ Time —Technical issues abound… YouTube says that if you tap “horizontal display” on your live cast, you’ll be able to broadcast in a way that befits the standard 16:9 ratio. Sadly, YouTube lies. For reasons no one understands, if you tap “horizontal display,” you’ll be horizontal… but YouTube will broadcast you sideways. So. Very. Dumb. —Did’ja see the headlines? “MORGAN WALLEN STORMS OFF SNL STAGE!” Or, you know… He hugged the host, and sort of just sauntered off. “Show’s over. Time to go home.” People will make a big deal over anything they can these days, because manufactured outrage sells. What a time to be alive. —Speaking of manufactured outrage, the dumbest of the dumb people on the planet got mad at SNL writer Colin Jost for insinuating alcoholic Pete Hegseth was drunk on the job. These, of course, are the exact same people who were extremely forgiving of Hegseth using a non-secure app to share war plans, and having a reporter in on the chat with him and his idiot coworkers. (These dumb people, the outraged, are also fine with people lying under oath. Funny, that.) A side discussion involves the fact Saturday Night Live has always been consistently average. Never great, never awful, just… “there.” —They’re here! They’re ruining the economy! Something that rhymes here and that’s pithy and catchy! (Forgive me, I was trying to do a play on the whole, “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it!”) Well, Donald “I bankrupted multiple businesses, and a casino” Trump is doing his best to bankrupt America. Anyone with an IQ above that of a turnip can see it, which is why you see his minions defending the loss of trillions of dollars in the stock market. —Because no one in the NFL seems able to duplicate the “tush push” as well as the Eagles, several teams are trying to have it banned. Because that’s easier than drawing up a plan to defend against it, apparently. What a sissy nation we’re in… football is supposed to be a combination of rough and tumble manliness, and strategy. And yet, here we are, with the Green Bay Packers (my team!) leading the charge to go crybaby over it. Boo, I say. Boo. Side discussion: a very clever (sarcasm) commenter tries calling us “groomers,” which leads to a discussion on what the term even means anymore. (Also: nathan’s son pops in to talk about going swimming.) —What is the difference between slander/libel, and free speech? Pat McAfee might be finding out, soon. Mary Kate Cornett, of Mississippi, is suing McAfee, because he told the story of an internet rumor on air. McAfee never named Mary Kate, but she says the sheer fact he brought up the rumor associated with her was enough. Fascinating stuff… What will the courts say? —Corey Booker breaks records! Good on Booker for standing up for the people of America, and putting to rest a record previously held by Strom “Biggest racist, ever” Thurmond. I’m not sure if it’s funny, sad, or both, that the two longest speeches in the Senate were by a-holes trying to keep the country crappy. Strom Thurmond wanted a more racist America, and Ted Cruz didn’t want people to get healthcare. Well, Booker is the new winner, and he did it better than either of those other two idiots. —Connivence Store chain Quik Trip is getting into the alcohol game. Specifically, the beer market. Given that Miller seems to have given up the catchphrase, “It’s Miller time,” regarding the beer you drink once you’re off work, Quik Trip is going sideways with, “Quittin’ Time.” You’re done with work, so grab a brew to forget about how much you hate your job. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 619: Gene Simmons Cancels Tour 39:06

10 днів тому39:06

39:06

Apologies, but Zoom really screwed up. It recorded 5 seconds of our audio, so we had to yank it from YouTube. This week, we're talking Gene Simmons, Anthony Webster of Gel, Bryan Kohberger, corporations that won't shut up when they should, Justin Eichorn, and Elon Musk.

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Episode 618: Conservative Beer 38:46

17 днів тому38:46

38:46

00:00 Introductions 05:16 Save the WNBA 12:36 Conservative Beer 20:15 Mike Lindell 27:43 No Other Land 34:48 Sarah Silverman —We talk energy drinks, travel, and Hawaii. Crossing multiple time zones when traveling is a pain in the tuckus, which Jake remembers from his military days. Also: nathan recommends people watch Beverly Hills Cop annually, because it’s such a solid movie. —Angel Reese said that if she doesn’t get a raise, she’s sitting a season out. Last week, we laughed at the idea the league’s worst player would make demands like that, this week we discuss the fact that the WNBA is a money-losing venture. Even with all the eyeballs Caitlin Clark brought to the table, the WNBA was in the red to the tune of $40 million in 2024. Jake has ideas involving White Lotus and Only Fans, tune in to hear what they are. —Seth Weather is really insecure, because he has a teeny-tiny weiner. How do I know this? Well, he founded a conservative beer company, and sells “ULTRA RIGHT” beer. (And yes, the all caps is part of the brand.) Now, if there were whispers Weather made the beer as a joke to sell to insecure dudes with small weiners, that would be one thing. But it looks like he’s sincere in his belief that the culture war is important, and that living your life is too easy, and beer drinkers should bring politics into their urine-water. Problem is, he may have positioned himself to be slightly too close to the branding of Michelob Ultra, and now Anheuser-Busch is suing him. We’re rarely on the side of big corporations here, but here’s to hoping AB bankrupts him. —Speaking of crazy, Mike Lindell is in the news. Again. You have to (in some ways) respect a dude who is so crazy, he believes in his cause, despite all evidence to the contrary. Lindell loses case after case in court, and even though it’s because he’s a madman with zero evidence that anything he’s said is even remotely true, he’s sticking by the idea the deep state is out to get him. How do such monumentally stupid people become so successful? It’s insane. Side discussions involve Elon Musk having gone insane. —There’s no such thing as bad press, and Miami Beach mayor Steven Meiner is proving that. A local movie theater in his town began showing the Oscar-winning documentary, “No Other Land,” and instead of letting this happen quietly, Meiner fluffed up the one-inch wonder worm between his legs and said, “Not on my watch!” Naturally, by protesting the film Meiner brought attention to it. Neither Jake nor nathan had heard of the movie, because neither of them watches the Oscars (who does?), but now it’s in the zeitgeist. Anyway, why is the mayor of any city getting involved in what films a movie theater shows? Well, tracking back to Seth Weather and his idiot beer: insecurities. The loudest voices are always the dumbest, and Meiner proves that. Sadly. Side discussions involve complete a-hole Mahmoud Khalil, who, though a complete a-hole, should have his right to be a complete a-hole protected in a country that supposedly supports free speech. —Speaking of free speech, Sarah Silverman is going on tour. What happens when that’s advertised on social media? Lol, the dumbest of the dumb come out to play. Hear what they have to say about Sarah and her jokes. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 617: So You Wanna Be a Rock Star? 37:40

25 днів тому37:40

37:40

00:00 Introductions 01:54 Gene Simmons 16:05 Stephen Pearcy 26:10 Angel Reese 33:01 Elon Musk —Jake has a sty, everyone. His left eye is gross, funny, purple, ugly… So, hopefully you’re listening to this on Spotify, not watching us on YouTube. —You wanted the best, you got the best, the bass player from the hottest band in the mid-to-latter-half of the 1970s, Gene Simmons! I kid, I kid. I was a huge KISS fan, back in the day. Saw ‘em… Jesus, probably over a dozen times. One of the biggest moneymakers in music these days is the VIP ticket, where you get a meet & greet with the celebrity before the show. But has anyone thought of a “pay to work for me” before? Not that I know of. But, for $12,000+, you can be a roadie for a day! Sounds… Exciting? A side discussion involves nathan’s stint as a substitute teacher in Iowa, and the “training” he received for that gig. —Alas, poor Pearcy, we hardly knew ye. Stephen was the lead singer of Ratt, the one-hit wonder from 1984. Sure, they put out many albums, and even tried a comeback with Way Cool Jr., but nothing ever matched their peak of Round and Round. No one really knows what Pearcy is up to these days, but he is on Twitter, complaining about Green Day being political on stage. Um… Has he never heard Green Day? They’ve been political since the day they were formed. Not every song, no, but enough so that it shouldn’t be a surprise when they take the correct stance on any issue. Either way, Green Day is currently playing stadiums, and Pearcy is… Well, not. So… Take any and all advice with a grain of salt. —Angel Reese is threatening a WNBA strike, and dozens of people are worried. What if a sports league based off one player (Caitlin Clark) decides to take a season off? What will the people who only watch Caitlin do? To quote Colonel Kurtz: the horror…. The Horror… Again, we kid. I’m sure some people would care, but the fact Angel, the most sub-par player in the league, is the one making the threats? Oh, that’s just delicious. —This is fascinating… When nathan found this story, it was very clearly listed as an opinion piece. But, in the several days since seeing it, and discussing it on the podcast, it was relabeled. Suddenly, it’s a “business” article, even though it’s nothing more than some whiner crybabbying about Elon Musk. Journalism! *arm swish* Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 616: Making the Death Penalty Funny 30:10

4 weeks тому30:10

30:10

00:00 Introductions 00:56 The Death Penalty 15:06 Republican Town Hall Meetings 20:54 Tariffs! 25:55 TV Recommendations —Jake and nathan have always differed on the death penalty: nathan is for it, Jake is against it. Brad Sigmon became the first person since 2010 to be executed by firing squad. South Carolina did the honors, and Brad himself made the decision to forgo lethal injection, or old sparky (the electric chair) and accept being shot. Sigmon was convicted in 2002 in the beating deaths of his ex-girlfriend’s parents, and declined lethal injection because of concerns over its use in the last three executions in South Carolina. How do comedians make this funny? Tune in and see! (Exclamation points!) —Republicans are playing a losing hand, and they know it. Their constituents are angry, and showing up to town hall meetings with legislators in good numbers. So what does Speaker of the House and fake Christian Mike Johnson have to say about it? He’s telling elected officials to avoid meetings, because “paid protesters” are showing up to be disruptive. I’d say he knows he’s lying, but I can’t tell anymore. Someone so willing to sell his soul to the devil is probably so removed from reality, he might actually think that George Soros is hiring old farmers to complain about Elon Musk, DOGE, and the firing of veterans. —Trump announces tariffs, the stock market tanks, so he pauses them. Why are we taking anything he says seriously, again? It’s comically sad at this point. Also: Tesla stock is continually dropping. Here’s to hoping it hits rock bottom. —nathan is big on Win or Lose, on Disney+, and Jake is watching White Lotus. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 615: Wisconsin Democrats Want to Lose Elections 29:40

5 weeks тому29:40

29:40

00:00 Introductions 02:05 IVF and Gender 08:13 Livechat Comments 11:04 iPhone Bug 13:27 Tulsi Gabbard 17:32 Dear Abby 23:41 Health —Here, we explain that Zoom is most likely at fault for our recent (and perpetual) audio issues. Did we try and fix things by jumping to Google Meet and/or Microsoft Teams? Yes. Yes we did. Google said we can’t record conversations, and Teams said, “Here’s how you add members…” And then gave the WRONG explanation. So, good job, Google and Microsoft. Ugh. Stuck with Zoom… for now. —Wisconsin Governor Tony Evers took time out of his day to defend an idiotic change to a bill. While it’s kind to try and be all inclusive when using gender terms, sometimes it becomes beyond silly. When seeking reproductive help—in vitro fertilization—suggested changes include turning “husband” to “spouse,” “wife” to “person,” “father” to “parent” (or “natural parent”) and “mother” to “inseminated person.” Why? Because apparently liberals have way too much time on their hands. This is red meat for Republicans. Red. Meat. They’ll use it to eat Evers alive in the next election. A completely stupid self-inflicted wound by Democrats. Good job, dummies. —We turn to the chat, and in that moment are reminded of the time our podcast blew up. What happened? Anti-circumcision idiots were offended by the fact we mentioned circumcision in passing on the podcast. Man, what fun times, being trolled by morons. Usually the morons that troll us are MAGA cultists. —Someone put a bug into iPhone text-to-speech technology, but, in reality, it was a fix. If you dictated the word, “racist,” to your phone, the transcription would read, “Trump.” And then it would self-correct. Which is hilarious, and accurate. But, Apple is going to remove that feature. Bummer. —Is Tulsi Gabbard the biggest hypocrite on the planet? Yes. Kind of. I mean, it’s a title she shares with every Trump sycophant. But, she’s firing intelligence officers for sending sexually explicit messages. Hmmm… Who does she work for, again? Who did she endorse? I forget. Mr. Grab them, where? How many times has he been in court for assault? How much does he owe E. Jean Carroll? —If you are dumb, you turn to online advice columnists to solve your extremely dumb problems. Such is the case of one woman, who turned to Dear Abby, and asked her if she should divorce her husband. Why? They haven’t had sex in over 10 years, and he’s manic and has threatened to kill people. Wow, what a great fella! She should probably stay with him forever! Not. Ugh. Walk, girl. Walk. —Where do we get our medical information? TikTok. Because why wouldn’t we? A random video went viral, and started a discussion about body temperature. Because of course it did. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 614: An Iconic Restaurant on Death’s Door 38:30

6 weeks тому38:30

38:30

00:00 Introductions 00:36 Kim Sae-ron 06:38 Gangnam Style singer, PSY 13:41 Social Security & COVID 19:30 Trump Lies 21:26 Hooters 28:39 Free Palestine 33:34 Pete Buttigieg —Kim was a beautiful South Korean actress who took her own life. Why? Because she had a bit too much to drink one night, got behind the wheel of her car, hit a power station (or something like that), and was arrested for DUI. (Or OWI, whatever it’s called where you live.) Long story short: she brought shame upon herself, and had to check out. That boggles my American mind, because here, we put drunks in all sorts of positions of power. Hey, gorgeous South Korean actresses who like to imbibe alcohol: move to the U.S. of A. We won’t mind your habits. Side discussion: Hawk Tuah girl, her crypto, and disappearance. —Staying in South Korea, PSY, the singer behind the enormous hit ‘Gangnam Style,’ lost weight recently. He posted a picture of his new self on social media, and was praised and embraced for his efforts. Lol, j/k. He got shouted at, shamed, and issued a semi-apology. What is wrong with society (and celebrities) that we shame them for getting healthy, and they feel the need to apologize for not being fat anymore? Happened to Adele, and probably one or two others. Dumbest thing, ever. Side discussion: obesity, and all the ways we’ve danced around the subject due to political correctness. —Social Security has been saved, everyone! It’s solvent again! Why? Covid! So many people passed away that Social Security saved $205 billion! Silver lining to the pandemic! Side discussion: viewer comments. —While campaigning, Donald Trump said things like Medicaid, Medicare, and Social Security wouldn’t be touched. He also said he never heard of Project 2025. Well, now he’s in office, and he’s done a 180. Just like anyone and everyone with an IQ higher than that of a turnip knew he would. —Oh no, one of the worst restaurants chains of all time might file for bankruptcy! Where will I see women that rank between 5 - 6 on the hotness scale and food that ranks below Denny’s on the flavor scale? Seriously, how did it say in business this long? —Last week, an overly passionate (yet under-educated) commenter started crowing about Palestine. No nuance, just nonsense. So, let’s talk about Israel, Palestine, and the Gaza conflict. —Mayor Pete should’ve been the nominee in 2020, because we wouldn’t be in the mess we’re in now had he been. Is he gonna run in 2028? He’s certainly making overtures. The far left is insane; Obama has called them out in the past, and now Pete Buttigieg is hitting them. This is a good thing. This is a very good thing. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 613: Funny Stories 35:09

7 weeks тому35:09

35:09

00:00 Introductions 00:52 Dajua Blanding 06:31 Draft Kings 09:54 Tom Brady 11:21 Kayla Nicole 15:42 Bras 17:34 James Carville 23:21 Anna Paulina Luna 24:57 Drag Queen Story Hour 27:52 Shark Attack —Given the state of things since the inauguration, people have been down in the dumps. Well, we’re here to change that this week, with stories focused on hilarity. —Morbidly obese rapper Dank Demoss ordered a Lyft. When a normal-size sedan showed up and refused to let her attempt to squeeze in—She weighs almost 500 pounds—she threw a fit, and filed a lawsuit. Then, she went on The Breakfast Club podcast and couldn’t fit into their normal-size office chairs. They had to get her a couch. And just like that, she handed Lyft the clip they needed in order to win their case. “Your honor, she is so amazingly fat that she doesn’t even fit into a chair. Our driver was protecting the integrity of his shocks, wheels, suspension, frame…” What does she rap about, anyway? Cake? Going off a livestream comment, Jake discusses the meaning behind “Free Palestine.” —A new survey shows that more and more, people look at gambling/sports betting as an investment. Like a 401K. I mean… I knew we lived in a country full of morons, but this is where we’re at: putting $50 on the Super Bowl is gonna pay the kid’s college tuition, apparently. Speaking of the Super Bowl, Jake lost money on the game; take that, Jake’s kids! —Was he the worst sports announcer of the year? Maybe. He was definitely the worst football announcer, because for the love of God, he can’t say “pass.” Brady spent too much time in Boston, and now he has enough of that Boston accent to be annoying. How has no one sat him down and taught him how to speak? Jesus. —Travis Kelce played like garbage in the Super Bowl. Is that sexist to say? If the answer is, “No,” then why is it automatically assumed it’s sexist for people to have an opinion about his ex? —A livestream comment takes nathan by surprise, and gets both nathan and Jake giggling furiously. —It’s conspiracy theory time! James Carville wonders if there’s a “plant” in the DNC trying to see what stupid things he can get them to do. I mean, that has to make sense at this point, right? They just lost, big time, and the response is to double down on the stupid shit that lost them the election? Obsessing over non-binary equity instead of the overall economy isn’t going to win votes, dummies. —Who is stupider, MAGA politicians, or the MAGA faithful who vote those stupid, stupid, oh-so-stupid people into office. Loyalty > Intelligence, as proven time and time again with these incredibly dumb people. —Once again, a child has been abused by a Drag Que… Oh, wait. It was another Christian leader. It’s always a member of the church abusing kids. But sure, focus on the Drag Queens. —The United States tries so hard to have bragging rights when it comes to the dumbest people on the planet, but, man… Canada is giving us a run for our money. A Canadian woman wanted a selfie with a shark… …and had her hands bitten off. The stupid is off the charts here. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 612: The Speed of News 34:06

8 weeks тому34:06

34:06

00:00 Introductions 01:15 Tariff Followup 03:21 Plane Crash Followup 06:59 Kanye West 13:20 Trevor Noah 24:00 Oh, Canada 29:30 The Super Bowl —Trump was going to drop tariffs on China, Mexico, and Canada. Everyone (except his lapdog-sycophant Republican legislators) said it was a bad idea; he said, “It’s happening…” And the markets reacted by tanking. So, he called everything off, and declared victory. Our president, ladies and gentlemen. —Speaking of our president being super smart: after the tragic helicopter/plane crash in D.C., he said, “It’s DEI.” Well, a slew of white pilots later, one safety switch turned off, and a helicopter flying 300 feet above its fly zone… Oops. It’s funny, because he created blame, anger, and victimization for no reason. —Everyone’s favorite anti-Semite is back in the news! Kanye went on a hate-rant on Twitter, and the world screamed in horror. Come on… we don’t expect this from him by now? This isn’t news. We hit quite a few live chat comments during this segment. Jake compares Kanye to Mel Gibson and his racist rants using the n-word, and nathan compares Kanye still being able to stream music to notorious perverts who still get played: R. Kelly, and Michael Jackson. People separate the art, from the artist. —Ah, crybabies. Is there anything they won’t cry about? Oh, right. No. They’re crybabies. Trevor Noah made a joke about illegal immigrants voting for Grammy winners, and referenced the fact cocaine is produced in Columbia. What happened? Ten of the stupidest people on the planet jumped on Twitter to whine. Meanwhile, the actual president of Columbia, Gustavo Petro, said, “Cocaine is no worse than whiskey.” Should it be legalized? Should drugs be legalized? Maybe, as long as they don’t do it like Portland, Oregon did. They decriminalized drugs, and gave homeless people more power than taxpayers. Odd choice, and it didn’t work out for them at all. —Elon Musk is currently showing the world that he’s an even bigger a-hole than you ever thought, which is amazing, considering everyone knew he was a pretty big a-hole to begin with. Well, Ontario Premier Doug Ford decided to act, and is voiding a $68 million contract with Starlink, a Musk owned business. Good on ya, Ford. We also talk about cuts to USAID. —We recorded this before the Philadelphia Eagles DOMINATED the Kansas City Chiefs, but now that it’s over? Wooooo! Thank. God. Everyone is so sick of the Chiefs, and man, it’s sad that Kelce seems to have lost some of his sense of humor. Patrick Mahomes took a joke question about refs in stride, but Kelce pouted. Fly Eagles Fly. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 611: ForkLyft 27:22

9 weeks тому27:22

27:22

00:00 Introductions 01:03 Plane Crash 03:42 DEI 09:39 Harvey Weinstein 11:03 Chinese Incels 16:01 Dank Demoss 19:15 Anti-Abortion States 21:12 Tariffs —The crash of American Airlines Flight 5342 is a tragedy. There’s no other way to describe it. Families are devastated, and will forever be changed. So, naturally, the media is trying to cash in any way they can. Clickbait headlines are generally awful, but when they’re used to take advantage of something this horrific, it makes people want to believe in hell, that the “reporters” might burn their for their sins. Gibson Johns—if that’s a real person an not a handle given to an article written by AI—and E! News (which should be in quote, “News”) cashed in my offering a scary headline about a chilling photo by one of the victims of the crash, a teenage boy who will be missed by his parents for the rest of their lives. It’s disgusting, and Jake has special words regarding the “reporters” who seek out families after a tragedy. —Speaking of cashing in on a tragedy, Donald Trump once again showed his complete inability to lead with grace, or compassion, turning an awful situation into an opportunity to rally his political base using anger, an ignorance. Blaming the crash on DEI right out of the gate was a bold move, but red meat the dumbest of the dumb could lap up like the dogs they are. In an interesting twist, however, he threw “dwarfism” into the mix as one of the reasons the plane crash happened. Interesting. —A couple episodes back, Jake said Harvey got out of jail. nathan was dumbfounded, “How did I miss that?!?” Turns out, nathan missed nothing! Harvey is still locked up in Rikers Island, just like he deserves to be. —Oh, China… You best America in so many ways—bullet trains, airports, education… and now, INCELS. Yes, while our INCELS go on rampages, and hurt people, yours go look at panda bears. Dammit, China. Stop being better than us. —Dank Demoss is rapper who hates several things: salads, walking, and reality. Dank weighs 489 pounds, and thinks that if she orders a Lyft, she should be able to get into whatever arrives, be it a Honda Civic, or a Mini Cooper. When her ride arrived, the driver took one look at her and said, “Nope. My shocks and tires can’t take that kind of abuse,” and locked her out. Naturally, this caused Dank to have a “come to Jesus” moment, where she turned her life around, began eating right, and exercising. Of COURSE I’m kidding. She’s suing Lyft, because personal responsibility doesn’t exist. —Is an exodus taking place from states with impossibly restrictive bans on women’s health? The Los Angeles times thinks so. Why? Because speculation, that’s why. In an article heavy on thoughts and light on facts, it is opined that a less than 1% population departure from states more interested in fairy tales than medicine, means it’s got to be because of a political wedge issue. Great job, Los Angeles Times. Way to waste column space. —Well, things are gonna get interesting. Despite anyone and everyone with an IQ above that of your average turnip understanding that tariffs make things more expensive for the consumers of the country applying said tariffs, Donald Trump announced 25% additions to Mexican and Canadian goods, and 10% on Chinese imports. What was the immediate reaction? Trillion-dollar hedge funds started taking out massive shorts on the American Economy. In 2008, a few wise men beat the crap out of the banks and made hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars off their stupidity. Now, the American people will lose, and rich look to get richer. Yay. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 610: Week One 35:04

10 weeks тому35:04

35:04

00:00 Introductions 01:00 Donald Trump 10:06 Elon Musk 18:36 Afghanistan 25:55 Winter Tips 32:35 Netflix —He’s back! Donald Trump is president again, and things are going just swimmingly. Remember that whole, “I have no idea what Project 2025 is?” Lol, ah, good times. What lies. Well, the Project 2025 is in full effect, with Trump signing a slew of executive orders, all designed to lower the price of eggs. No more DEI, pausing federal hiring, and, in a bold move, raising the price of medication for those in need, and granting pardons to people who assault police officers. —We turn to the live YouTube comments, and someone asked what we thought of Elon Musk and his very blatant Nazi salute. Live chat was moving fast, so we handle a lot of comments here. —Well, once again, we’re hanging our allies out to dry. Whenever we enter another country, we tell the citizens, “Hey, help us. We’re the good guys. We’ll take care of you in the back end.” And then we never, never, do. We just leave them. How/why anyone trusts us is beyond me. (Jake gets pretty upset by this story.) —How do you survive the bitter winter chill? We have an article full of tips for you. And no lie, number one is important. (So stay tuned.) Side note: We do briefly touch up on the TikTok ban, and why it’s stuuuuuupid. —Netflix is raising their prices. Again. Which is why I cancelled them years ago. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 609: Caitlin Clark & Carrie Underwood 36:35

11 weeks тому36:35

36:35

00:00 Introductions 00:18 The NFL 04:25 Ryan Caldwell 10:45 Caitlin Clark 17:19 Carrie Underwood 25:21 Starbucks 29:36 L.A. Landlords —What happened? Seriously, what happened? The Packers were never gonna go far in the playoffs, but the entire NFC North collapsed! The Vikings and Lions both went one-and-done. The Lions were supposed to dominate! Ugh. Side discussion: TikTok is gone! Banned! It’s… Oh, wait. By the time we were finished recording, it was back. Booo. —Eagles Superfan Ryan Caldwell was caught on video being quite naughty. He called a woman in Green Bay Packers garb a no-no word; the one women really (REALLY) dislike. The internet hunted him down, and got him fired… Which is hilarious, not because his own actions came back to bite him in the ass, but because a 50+ year-old white fella was a DEI consultant. Holy, poop. How funny is that? “Hey, we need someone to help this company with diversity, equity, and inclusion. We need more people of color, more women, more members of the LGBTQ community… Let’s hire an old white dude to help!” Just silly. —WNBA phenom Caitlin Clark has a stalker. Well, she probably has several, but one of them, Texas resident Michael Thomas Lewis, was just arrested for harassing her. When standing before the judge, he shouted that he was guilty, so the judge entered a plea of “Not guilty” for him. What? Why? He admitted to guilt! Throw him in jail. This stupid legal system of ours… —Shocking update! Carrie Underwood, a country star with many MAGA fans, is going to perform at Trump’s inauguration! WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THIS COMING??? Naturally, liberal crybabies don’t like this development, so they jumped online to whine. So dumb. —Starbucks has issued a new company policy: you have to buy something to sit in their stores and use their internet and/or bathrooms. What? Shocking! The most logical corporate policy is coming back to Starbucks? How dare they be reasonable?? —How do you screw up a story about price gouging? By writing it from a point of view that tries to create sympathy for the ultra-wealthy. Landlords in Los Angeles are hiking rent prices to take advantage of people having lost their homes… But they’re renting mega-mansions at higher prices than they used to. Oh, and maybe poor people are getting taken advantage of, too. Maybe. They didn’t really look into that. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 608: L.A. Fires 35:41

12 weeks тому35:41

35:41

00:00 Introductions 01:36 Blake Lively 10:57 Drone vs. Plane Wing 20:22 Alec Baldwin 25:58 Donald Trump —How much is enough? You’re a rich movie star, so you need more? Blake Lively says that the slander campaign against her hurt sales of her hair and beverage products. Which, it might have done. Or, people just weren’t interested in her hair and beverage products. It’s a bit silly, but, so is life. —Because they’re kind people, Canada has sent firefighting planes to the U.S. to help scoop and dump water on the flames. So, naturally, one of them is currently out of commission, because it hit a civilian drone doing lookie-loo nonsense. In the chat, a commenter who worked on these planes gives insight into what happened. —Well, the accidental death Rust lawsuit has ended, and Alec Baldwin is in the clear. Which means he wants to move on with his life, right? Nope! He’s going after the prosecutors, for prosecuting him. It’s a bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s see if it pays off for him. —Trump wants to rename the Gulf of Mexico, the Gulf of America. Which is hilarious. Good for him. The Panama Canal, Greenland, this… The best part of it is: feckless Republicans go along with every one of his dumb ideas, because he’s a toddler throwing a tantrum, and they’re cowards. Side note: remember “Freedom Fries?” Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 607: ISIS in America 33:57

13 weeks тому33:57

33:57

00:00 Introductions 0:150 Shamsud-Din Jabbar 14:38 DEI in Universities 21:50 Brad Spafford 28:41 Alfred Rava —We begin with apologies. We know we’ve mentioned this several times over the past several weeks, but Jake and his family (wife, two kids, two dogs, cat) are moving. They just got to their new house, which means the first half of craziness has passed, but as we record, they’re in the second half of insane. Things are in boxes, the kids are noisy… there’s a lot going on. HOPEFULLY, next week, Jake will have all his audio issues taken care of. Cross your fingers, and thanks for your patience. —Is there a bigger douchebag out there right now than Shamsud-Din Jabbar? Sure, historically, there are bigger losers, but at the moment, this guy is the absolute worst. Thrice divorced, failed businesses, and does he look in the mirror and pick the common denominator, him? Nope! He lashes out at the world around him. Ugh. Such an a-hole. Makes me wish I believed in hell, so I could find peace in the knowledge he’s down there right now, waiting for Trump and his ilk. We also discuss (and praise) Master Sergeant Matthew Alan Livelsberger, who took himself out in Vegas. He didn’t go on a rampage, and target innocent people, he ended his problems the right way, but removing himself from the game. Good on ya, Master Sergeant. —The University of Iowa is dialing back its DEI courses. That’s a win for conservatives, right? Well, not really. A university with 33,000 students is cutting programs that, combined, had less than 60 students. So… Yeah, that’s just a good business move. “Oh, no one is interested in this? Yeah, cut the program.” —Speaking of douchebags… Brad Spafford has a lawyer, and that lawyer is a big one. Brad Spafford seems to have issues. He has a hobby of making bombs. Lots and lots of them. And I’m not talking about movies that don’t make back their budget. The FBI found out about him, arrested him, and a lawyer is arguing for his release into society. Dude is the biggest walking red flag you’ve ever seen, and a lawyer wants him walking around unfettered. Yay. —Speaking of douchebag lawyers, Alfred Rava appears to be an enormous one. He files lawsuits for incels against businesses that dare to offer a “ladies night,” in order to attract customers. Apparently the weakest, most pathetic man-boys on the planet are threatened by women getting a dollar off the drink you’re probably going to buy for them anyway, and think it should be illegal. Why? Because when women go to a bar, men go to a bar. They go to a bar and talk to women. But not man-boy incels. No, they’re afraid of women, so instead of allowing normal men to enjoy a night at a bar full of women, they sue. And Alfred Rava takes the case. Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to. Tune in and get your giggle on. Find Jake at @jakevevera Find nathan at nathantimmel.com…

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Episode 606: Blake Lively Strikes Back 39:30

14 weeks тому39:30