A chapter by chapter, beat by beat analysis of classic Japanese Roleplaying Games (JRPG). We delve deep into the story, dialogue, game mechanics, music, influences, and themes. We've covered Xenogears, Chrono Cross, Final Fantasy VIII, Suikoden, Suikoden II, Xenosaga Episode I, Final Fantasy Tactics, and Lunar: Silver Star Story Complete. Yes, we will kill god.
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Our podcast is about Michelle Philpots and her Retrograde Amnesia
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E9: Fireflies on the Open Seas [Hispanola]
1:15:55
1:15:55
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1:15:55
I won’t ferget your help. In fact, because of it, we’re introducing a fresh multiverse theory, confirming script suppositions, remembering we can’t sail without light, parting ways at the boat ride, climbing our big pole, eating fish every day, crying out for a minimart, changing out of boy mode inside of Luna mind, thinking clean dirty thoughts, s…
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E8: Skyward Frontbangs [Old Hag's Forest]
1:05:09
1:05:09
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1:05:09
What the flippin’ hotdog is going on? Oh, I know, we’re exploring the nature of hags, visiting angelfire, finding an idiot in a dummy trap, twirling a comb, refusing the oxford comma, boiling a cauldron of animals, equating a hag to a witch, detesting backwoods inbreds, failing the ice mace quest, remaining calm while a monster wreaks havoc, fighti…
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E7: Fart Voyage [Saith]
1:06:51
1:06:51
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1:06:51
I don’t wash my hands, so I’m always hungry. Come along with us on a fantastic fart voyage while we’re reeking of fish, becoming the Orca, leaning of Luna’s reputation, filching a chicken, encountering the beastmen, noticing the absence of lore outside of the Four Heroes, hinting at a race war, cruising for a bruising, speaking without dentures, la…
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E6: All Things Are Real If You Get Enough Food and Rest [Weird Woods]
1:04:37
1:04:37
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1:04:37
That’s that. Do whatever you want, don’t mind me, son. Just start learning what a chow bell is, receiving money from mom, wondering if Nall is a hallucination, dreaming the dark, hearing a song on the breeze, regretting the tone of the official guide, envying the children, razzing Ramus into oblivion, sleeping in the shed, clearing up “rump acne,” …
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E5: Woke and Crunchy [White Dragon Cave]
1:06:30
1:06:30
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1:06:30
We have somehow earned this thing’s respect. You have somehow earned Episode 005, where we’re touching on some healing stones, washing out a bridge, traversing across the battlefield, grunting at the sight of a human, appreciating bitmap cut-scenes, referencing Mega Man 8 (derogatory), rewarding boys with special turds, baiting baboons into ice blo…
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E4: Special Boy Sauce [Burg]
1:01:17
1:01:17
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1:01:17
We know you’re sick with worry, but worry not, because this time we’re CAPITALIZING SELECT DIALOGUE, erecting a monument, putting up with a bean brain, choking the chicken, identifying pigs, failing to speak pig latin, refusing to understand what Nall is, standing in the spring like a cool guy, demonstrating ocarina prowess, plotting to ditch Luna,…
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E3: Sufficient for My Advent [Prologue]
1:07:56
1:07:56
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1:07:56
I am not embarrassed to be anime. Neither is Lunar, as we’re wondering when Chrono Trigger will cease its powers of inspiration, defying fantasy/anime archetypes, reading the strategy guide promo, marveling at the Sega CD vocal intro, swerving into the PSP prologue, trapping Althena in an undersea base, summoning clip art demons for a covenant, bre…
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Lunar: Silver Star Story | E2: Turd-Smoking Coward [Development & Localization, Part II]
1:18:14
1:18:14
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1:18:14
We’re still talking about the Lunar before we play it. You know what that means: we’re altering game code for the reality of commerce, smoking turds like a coward, slandering Shannen Doherty, dubbing in dubious farts, artificially adjusting the difficulty, cringing at the worst magazine ad of all time, giving away a demo disc, choosing kindness ove…
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Hello and welcome to season 7! We’re covering Lunar: Silver Star Story Complete, which entails going over which version(s) of Lunar’s Silver Star Story we’re playing, outlining every Lunar that exists, figuring out how many dollars games cost, wondering what the situation is with Studio Alex, designing a cold world, spreading democracy on the moon,…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E29: Thong, For Some Reason [Endgame, Part II + Epilogue]
1:44:25
1:44:25
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1:44:25
To enter Season 6’s final episode is to bid goodbye to the light of day. If you accept, we’re referencing other Final Fantasies games in bullshit missions, letting someone else explore Midlight’s Deep, slaying the hell magician, fighting in fart gas, destroying more jobbers, bending knees to demons, trying to kickstart Virgo, wanting for blood, ide…
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You know nothing, Beowulf. You know we’re inventing additional antagonists for unnecessary sidequests, re-dragoning someone for a kidnapping plot, walking into an obvious trap, treating with steel, literally casting doubt, stealing a lady back from a pervert priest, debating belief vs fornication, nervously crafting a birthday scheme, overdoing the…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E27: The Three Main Shitheads [Murond Holy Place]
1:05:45
1:05:45
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1:05:45
Lives and levels, or men and boards? How about pods and casts, featuring us dropping in on perverts, murdering clergy members, slingin’ blood off a sword, remaining lawful, observing an indoor turd river, picking up a book, exposing craven cowards, returning to the father, serving death by steel, reborning a brother, re-killing a brother, pumping a…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E26: To Frustrate a Plot [Back to Igros Castle]
1:11:13
1:11:13
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1:11:13
Here’s a souvenir for you on the way to hell. It’s a podcast, one in which we’re appreciating sprite animation, frustrating the high confessor’s plot, working to see queens made for true, pretending to leave the room, rendezvousing with perverts, resisting every scenario, screaming in the dark, naming that mushroom, adding a Cletienne scene, going …
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What devilry is this? It’s a podcast, once in which we’re wading in rebirth, boasting the brain of a dullard, fighting an old foe who died but didn’t, indulging in gratuity, interrupting pervert preparation, hanging a bag of teeth, refusing to acknowledge death, unpossessing numen, thinking of our sire’s flesh, becoming a blood member of darkness, …
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Final Fantasy Tactics E24: The Purgatory Loophole [Cloud Quest, Part II + Limberry Castle, Part I]
1:08:00
1:08:00
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1:08:00
The stone chooses the flesh. You have chosen to listen to us as we’re wondering why Aerith needs money, laughing like Kefka, not agreeing with arbitration, spilling blood on fancy riggins, looking for a good drubbing, refusing to argue with ghosts, killing dead people again, crushing grapes, leaving a fearsome stain, playing dumb and dumber about m…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E23: Sauce for the Goose [Bethla Garrison + Cloud Quest, Part I]
1:00:42
1:00:42
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1:00:42
Let’s away before we’re found. But first, listen while we’re ignoring height, raising a sluice gate, breaking Orlandeau out of the break room at work, questioning Valmafra’s allegiance, finding the one competent person who likes us, suffering a plague of fools, perverting an idiot, flashing that, gandering a goose, murdering a willing zealot, buyin…
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Now there is a podcast I had not thought to find in these wastes! Bathe with us in the muck as we’re learning from Matsuno why Orators get guns, possessing powerful evidence of the church’s misdeeds, staying two steps ahead, acting as expected, dropping spores in the wind, respecting the constitution, only understanding transactional relationships,…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E21: Authentic String Puller [Zeltennia Castle + Beowulf Quest]
1:19:11
1:19:11
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1:19:11
God is watching, have faith. God is also listening to us assuming the piss position, successfully whistling grass, gaslighting ourselves, flying in from Final Fantasy XII, pursuing beauty, acquiring heroes of myths and legends, ordering dairy from the liquor bar, caring not for coin, remembering Beowulf facts, befriending a dragon, wishing for the …
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Zodiac stones read the metadata of your heart. You ears read the metadata of us narrowing seven to four, making our name shit, waiting for a new dawn, using the auracite for good actually, false fighting the second pervert, citing heaven, campfire’ing next to corpses, killing jobbers off screen, simultaneously referencing U2 + Queen + Jefferson Air…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E19: Perverts Can Never Die [Riovanes Castle]
1:02:15
1:02:15
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1:02:15
All such tales of gods and their miracles are false. But not us, and not when we’re swearing on words that have no honor, realizing scripture is leverage, taking fate into mine own hands, listening to death noises, slaking thirst for revenge, selling out for the lord, perverting into another ghoul, unthinking brains, slaying another pervert, survey…
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The air is thick with death’s foul stench. This episode is thick with sliming rockets, adding another cultural stereotype, invalidating past benevolence with modern action, resolving sibling arguments, allowing a heretic to triumph, opening the orphanage-to-assassins pipeline, becoming conduits of heaven and nether, speaking to a frog, becoming a k…
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We are all but puppets, dancing as they pull our strings. You are all but listeners, frolicing as we’re taking shelter from the rain, meeting with an outland mage, being honest about forbidden knowledge, refusing to be a puppet, wishing no more need of tears, excavating at the mines, delivering job reports, falling out of Mana Secrets, recruiting a…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E16: Unsuitable Facts [Underground Book Storage, Part II]
1:06:38
1:06:38
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1:06:38
Only with power can dreams be made real. Only with this podcast can we tell you about wishing for the Auto-Face, persisting in a fool resistance, fighting in the book store, confusing opponents by betraying our class, normalizing the battle gauntlet, girding for battle, becoming a thrall of the church, jokerfying yet another would-be ally, living f…
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Final Fantasy Tactics E15: Brother's Blood in My Eyes [Lesalia + Underground Book Storage, Part I]
1:05:38
1:05:38
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1:05:38
What nonsense is this? Well, it’s an audio variety show where we’re playing Dycedarg’s theme for a meeting with Zalbaag, wondering if Zalbaag is dumb, failing to avoid Alma, proving truth words, fighting a heresy examiner, perverting into the Lucavi, profaning the gods, cutting a deal with Alma, rumoring Elmdore’s death, storing books underground, …
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Mentally, are you becoming a coward? Vocally, we’re entering a pope meeting, pronouncing “Orlandeau,” feeling lost in the sauce, using a prisoner’s confession as an excuse to kill a guy, recognizing Orlandeau’s prowess, showcasing multiple councils, haggling over war logistics, closing the borders, going against the big tide, performing the forbidd…
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