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Oh god, Jesus... we had a whole script written out, but all you need to know is that it's hot. It makes us hungry hot. It's so doggone hot that we can't run the podcast machine but twicet a month. It's too hot to do chores, so we just sit here in our own filth. We won't pay that electric company one more cent than we have to. Lord, it's hot.…
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Desmond has a premonition and realizes the Island is about to receive another visitor. He sets out for a camping trip with Charlie, Hurley, and Jin. Anticipating a reunion, Desmond reminisces about his first meeting with Penny Widmore. Andrew mixes up a couple of books. Apologies to Joseph Heller.Don‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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Juliet settles in to life on the beach. She reflects on her circumstances: the sister she left in Florida, the Island on which she's being held captive, the smooth Other with whom she enjoyed a tryst, and the bug-eyed Machiavelli who now controls her life. Her reminiscence culminates in a revelation of her true mission... M.C. and Andrew lament the…
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Will Horneff is not Will Friedle. He's also not Nate Richert. Charlize does have a pixie cut in Mighty Joe Young, but it's curly. Also, Naveen Andrews is in that movie. The Langoliers was adapted to a two-part television miniseries featuring David Morse and Dean Stockwell, but it's not great. M.C. and Andrew discuss the various properties based on …
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Nikki and Paulo were up to some high jinks prior to the 815 crash. On Island, they grapple over a sack of diamonds before meeting their chilling end. M.C. and Andrew chat video editing and discover a spell to remove someone's socks. I have a bag of jewels for you. They're jewels, Betty, they're jewels. I got them all for you.…
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Locke explodes a submarine for... reasons. Turns out, his dad pushed him out a window on the eighth floor of a building. Ben is currently confined to a wheelchair and to a set of striped pajamas. He also pulls Locke's dad out of a box. M.C. and Andrew anticipate the appearance of Lance Reddick and leaf through a Talbot's catalog.…
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Sayid meets a cat with the name of his lost love. The cat peers deeply into his soul, and he subsequently relives a traumatic encounter from his past. M.C. & Andrew discuss how wonderful and mystical and beautiful cats are, and they speculate on Nadia's forever home. Also, there's a new Dharma station, and it gets exploded.…
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Vincent finds a cool old van in the jungle, and Hurley recruits a pit crew to repair it. He has some prior experience with auto restoration. Hurley ponders his contentious relationship with his largely absent father and succeeds in getting the van to run. M.C. and Andrew chat Island meteorology and cast a BBC reboot of House, M.D.…
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Desmond has some issues keeping his memories in chronological order. It could be on account of all this 60-year old Scotch. Andrew and M.C. briefly forget how to properly conjugate verbs and Andrew has read two books total.Don‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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Further diversions will have to wait; this week, we're Not In Portland. Juliet struggles with her mad scientist experiments, with her Floridian existence, and with the overbearing influence of the men in her life. Will she successfully impreg her sister's cancer-compromised womb? Andrew and M.C. discuss television production schedules and touch eve…
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M.C. and Andrew read a whole book for this one: Gary Troup's posthumously published novel Bad Twin. Just kidding, it's metatextual marketing ghostwritten by an absurdly horny dude named Laurence Shames. Join us as we descend into a delirious heat-stroked world of ineffective detectives, dog-based intergenerational bromances, and extremely sweaty he…
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Sawyer once pulled a con in exchange for an early release from prison. Ben is Jigsaw now. M. C. and Andrew are ill-prepared, albeit enthusiastic, to tackle the patriarchy. Lorcan Finnegan, you're on blast, bro. RIP Anton YelchinDon‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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Sawyer surprise-kisses Kate. It's an issue. Andrew & M.C. have a long discussion about consent. Content Warning: There's a few brief mentions of suicide, and I also may have liberally used an audio sample of the event from the episode.Don‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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Andrew is late with the episode again. The release schedule is probably going to shift again soon. Spoiler alert for The Future (2011), Mr. Roosevelt (2017), Pet Semetary (2019), and How it Ends (2021). Content warning: brief mention of suicide and drug abuse.Don‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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Desmond Hume, Dickens in hand, completes a prison sentence and embarks on a sailboat race in a misguided attempt to impress the father of the woman he loves. He never completes the race, however, as a storm leaves him stranded on the Island. Over some Dharma booze, Locke and Desmond scheme to evict Eko from the Swan terminal chamber. Eko responds e…
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As Michael prepares his rescue party to infiltrate the Others' Camp, Sayid grows suspicious of him. We see flashbacks which illustrate the full story of Michael's mission. Meanwhile, the 815 survivors plan and execute a funeral for Ana Lucia and Libby. Andrew and M.C. consider their generational cohorts' tendency to turn on subtitles and the etymol…
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Mr. Eko used to work X-Files for a Catholic Church in Sydney; he remembers one case in particular involving a potentially clairvoyant girl. On Island, Eko and Locke chase spooky visions to the location of the Beechcraft crash--and Boone's fatal accident. Underneath the plane lies another Dharma station! Andrew and M.C. engage in speculation regardi…
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Everybody has gun fever! Ana Lucia bones Sawyer in a ploy to get his gun. Her inability to exact revenge on Benry triggers a crippling crisis of identity. Ana Lucia reflects on a similar crisis from her past: the business trip in Sydney which landed her on the Island. Meanwhile, Hurley blunders through a date with Libby. M.C. speculates on Rodrigue…
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Bernard struggles to manage a beach-side construction project. Rose, recalling their Australian honeymoon, is concerned that Bernie is trying too hard to "fix things". After a bit of mutual honesty, they resolve to remain on the Island for good... M.C. and Andrew consider combination flashbacks and dig up some other LOST podcasts. https://donttellm…
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Hurley grapples with his long-standing self-loathing and the resurgence of a distressing hallucination. Libby does her best to console him. Andrew and M.C. chat about baked beans and struggle to understand Hurley's benzo prescription. #mydeckcollapsedDon‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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Locke grapples with still more memories of his abusive father. On island, he and Benry work together to get things done! Meanwhile, Jack and Sawyer measure one another's members. Andrew and M.C. try to diagnose a skin condition. Turns out, it's just ghouls.Don‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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Sun and Jin get some unexpected news: they're pregnant. While they're dealing with that mess, Ana Lucia convinces Benry Gale to tell her where his balloon is. Ana and Sayid embark on a mission to uncover the truth about their prisoner. Andrew and M.C. consider the legacy of DJ Screw and weigh the relative benefits of being a Swiftie or a Parrot Hea…
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Sayid grapples with the gruesome reality of his experiences in war as he struggles to accept his role as the Island's resident torturer. On Jack's orders, he interrogates the new tenant in the Swan's armory: "Henry Gale from Minnesota". Andrew and M.C. embrace anti-work propaganda and never forget.Don‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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We find out what Kate did. Oh boy... Kate, Sawyer, and Jack push the throuple a little further while Locke, Michael, and Eko tuck in for movie night. M.C. and Andrew give bad estimates of every character's age, and recoil in terror at the thought of riding horses.Don‘t Tell Me What I Can‘t Do!
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