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Aardvark Avarice is Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. Sometimes its straight up stand up. Sometimes it’s sketch comedy. Sometimes it’s fiction and sometimes it’s my life in a cracked nutshell. If you like shower thoughts, dad jokes, bad impressions, worse singing, sus writing, Ryan Reynolds, and Doctor Who, then this is for you. For everyone else, there’s the proverbial lemon you can go suck on. Enjoy!
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Aardvark is about an artist from Detroit who moved to LA. Art, debauchery, & interviews.
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Happy Holidays and welcome to Aardvark Avarice's "A Very Jaded Christmas." This is for all those poor sad sacks like me who look around and want to celebrate Christmas, want to feel the joy, want to revel in all its magnificence, but you just can’t. Well, I figured it out, and you can too. You just might have to do things a little – different. Why …
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Borture – the unofficial term for the “torture” that “boredom” puts us ADHD Atypicals through. In this podcast, I illustrate my struggles and hatred of Committee and Staff Meetings and the extremes I go through to combat the excruciating borture they put me through. Would I publicly record this podcast naked to avoid a Staff Meeting? You bet your b…
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Back by unpopular demand, I am very excited about the return of super villain, The Evil Genius. In this episode, he will give us updates on his nefarious ways including the addition of a sidekick. Also, we bring on a surprise special guest. Cheers!Ryan Robbins
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Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. Is there anything that embodies survival of the fittest than the morning commute and is there any movie that represents that dog-eat-dog battle better than Mad Max: Fury Road? In this episode we look at the morning commute for what it is, a gladiator fight for survival.…
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Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. With pleasure, I would like to welcome back to the podcast, the self-help show Ask Gorgon. Here with his unique and thoughtful insights to your letters is exiled emperor Gorgon the Destroyer, joined now by his new producer, Willie.…
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Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. Here we are again with yet another Garbage Plate. In this smorgasbord we cover Geico Customer Service, my personal manliness, a fat caterpillar, the Hulu HIMS conspiracy, the lovely tunes of Ace of Base, Septic Tanks, and a few quips from my 10-year-old son. Enjoy!…
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Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. It's true they can't all be winners. Dame Judi Dench and Sir Ian McKellen have won ever award under the sun, Idris Alba is liquid awesome, and Taylor Swift is - well, Taylor Swift. Yet, they all appeared in the movie Cats. Yeesh. My own crap show was a play called Sticky Buns. Do…
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This is part two and the conclusion of "Aliens Among Us". Will Tamara escape the unrelenting advances of Dan the finance man or will her alien capturer keep her imprisoned until she gives in to its demands - one box of chocolate covered peanuts. Sometimes, aliens just suck. Enjoy!Ryan Robbins
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On a sunny day in Central Park smarmy finance guy Dan attempts to chat up the attractive Tamara, but she's not making it easy. Neither is her little secret. It's alien related if you couldn't tell from the title. Aardvark Avarice presents the fiction story "Aliens Among Us". This is part one of a two-part series. Enjoy.…
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Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. The following is a sketch comedy presentation of a North American Football League post-game show. On field reporter Tugger Macdonald interviews players from the winning team, the Gridiron Goons. Enjoy! 1:35 - Connor "Hondo" Tate 7:05 - Dade Kimble 9:43 - Busby Fienes…
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Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. I just want to say that the mall is where men’s hairstyles go to die. Over a decade ago I made the mistake of getting a haircut at the mall and I've suffered the trauma ever since. Only now do I feel comfortable telling my story. My hope is that others can learn from my experienc…
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In this podcast I present letters of recommendation from an ROTC Seargeant, Bill Gates, and the big fuzzball himself, Chewbacca. With corresponding voices, of course. Yes, somewhere in the great slush pile ether, these letters accompanied very fictional resumes and cover letters I wrote to apply for very real jobs. Taxidermist. Pallbearer. CIA Agen…
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If you’ve listened before you know I like to do an occasional episode I call a garbage plate, where I throw together all the ideas that couldn’t fill out a whole episode on their own. This is garbage plate #3 where I discuss things like sneezes, Batman, Val Kilmer, Val Kilmer as Batman, motorboating (the naughty kind), Yo Mama, and my personal Mapl…
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I saw a nondescript white van sitting in front of my office building. Nothing ever good stepped out of a nondescript white van, and nothing ever safe and wholesome happened in a nondescript white van.Ryan Robbins
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For your pleasure, we here at the Aardvark have unearthed a lost recording of the late Sean Connery, God rest his soul. Harking back to his days as Darby O’Gill he gives us his rendition of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer… while showering. Enjoy.Ryan Robbins
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Ah, Wiki, ever the giver of miscellaneous information and filler content for high school research papers. This podcast looks at those unusual Wiki articles devoted to sports, and not just because I’m looking for a filler podcast. I really wanted to do the voices of two eels talking about the sport Conger Cuddling. Who wouldn't. Enjoy.…
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In this episode I interview supervillain, The Evil Genius. He is the two-time winner of the Rapscallion Reader’s Black-Hat award and the readers of Scoundrel Weekly voted him most likely to plunder, pillage and pontificate. The Evil Genius gives us some insight into his past and enlightens us on some of his proudest accomplishments.…
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This podcast is another of my brainless hodge podges. I throw together Nerd ADHD, Nietzsche Dad jokes, my distrust of a middle-aged stoner, the Little Mermaid, an encounter with a Zoomer, and plenty of singing into 19 minutes of gooey yumminess. Enjoy, and don't forget the wet wipes.Ryan Robbins
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Join us for the conclusion of The Werewolf and the Sociopath. This is Part 2 of a special Halloween series. Cheers!Ryan Robbins
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Happy Halloween Aardvarkians. For the next two episodes I will be going off script. In light of the holiday, we are diving into the devilish world of fiction. Aardvark Avarice is proud to present the short story The Werewolf and the Sociopath. This is part one. I hope you enjoy it. Cheers!Ryan Robbins
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I suggested I was going to do an episode on corrupting the youth and here we are. Is there any decade more corruptive than the 80s? I think not. If I wasn't a happily married man, I would still have my Like a Virgin poster hanging above my bed - I mean on my wall.Ryan Robbins
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We are happy to introduce a new addition to Aardvark Avarice titled Ask Gorgon. Former tyrannical ruler of the planet Turloth, Gorgon the Destroyer, offers his unique advice to any listener with a problem or question. If you would like to Ask Gorgon for advice, please send your questions to info@aardvarkavarice.com.…
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The following is a dramatized reading of a SPAM letter I received in my work email. Enjoy, but don't worry you have not been infected by malware. That itchy rash down around your junk is just Syphilis. I'm sure we have a cure for that by now.Ryan Robbins
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I am a nerd. I make know excuses. This is the way. For all of you out there who rock the horn rims, laugh at Apple's no touch policy and crack open that iPhone just because you can, and have submitted a Tron script to Disney for the next sequel, this episode is for you.Ryan Robbins
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The Hulk vs John Tesh, Deniece Williams for the soul, 80s D-bags, toilette etiquette, a hopeful Bromance, and plenty of uncomfortable singing. This is what happens when I decide to throw random thoughts and life events into a podcast episode. Enjoy.Ryan Robbins
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Is he or isn't he? That's the question. As a lover of all things cult, absurdist, and just plain weird, Nicolas Cage tops my list of over the top actors who never fail to entertain. Even in the worst movies ever conceived. "Deadfall" anyone? But, could Nic Cage actually be a vampire? In this episode we will explore that question as well as a dude w…
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Not that I'm a fan of Britney Spears, but "Oops!...I did it again." I made a mistake...again, only this time it was in my apology for the last mistake I made. Let's hope this doesn't become a systemic problem. Anyway, sorry René Auberjonois (RIP), or should I say Constable Odo of the Star Trek series Deep Space Nine. Wherever you are, take solace i…
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At times I will make mistakes during my podcasts and I will have to take time to account for those mistakes. I just didn't think it would happen so soon, or with a reference to a comedian I find about as funny or entertaining as Jar Jar Binks. That would be Ricky Gervais. In fact I'd rather go to a Gungan seminar on prostate health with Jar Jar as …
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"Never apologize, mister, it's a sign of weakness." John Wayne said that in "She Wore a Yellow Ribbon." What side of the coin do you fall on that assertion and if you wanted to imitate John Wayne, but lacked a robust southern drawl, what Harry Potter character's voice would you use instead? Join me as I look at the apology, comedy, and bad impressi…
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In the pilot episode I dive into that cuddly and loveable rapscallion, the dentist, and the enthralling topic of oral hygiene. Join me as I touch on the evils of fluoride rinse, alien probes - because dentistry and alien probes are undoubtedly linked, and gum love - which is bound to be the next viral sensation.…
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A bit of music, and a brief chit chat with up and coming artist Tomi.
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It's been a while folks.
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Aatdvarks Den Live in LA • Session 2 • Hey this is a call in! ? • Signal Defected • Interactions • Thirdy • Ubering • @union LA • Doc Martin Union LA 10.14.17 • Doc Martin 2 • Doc Martin3 • Drum n Bass Next Door @Union LA • MARQUES WYATT
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