Episode 222 Necey's VBAC + RCS + VBA3C

The VBAC Link

Our friend Necey joins us with her inspiring five birth stories today! Necey had a scheduled Cesarean for her first birth, a redemptive VBAC for her third, two scheduled C-sections after that, and a VBAC after three Cesareans for her fifth baby.

She shares how her VBA3C was a spiritual journey that gave her the strength to advocate among skeptics and have faith in herself to follow the path she knew she needed to take. We are so in awe of Necey’s powerful stories!

Additional Links

Necey's Family YouTube Channel

How to VBAC: The Ultimate Prep Course for Parents

Full Transcript under Episode Details

Full Transcript

Meagan: Hello, you guys. It’s February and we have more beautiful stories coming your way. Today we have our friend Necey. Her name is Donice but she goes by Necey. She has a whole bunch of stories. She is unique because she is a VBAC and then a VBAC after two Cesareans. She has five cute kiddos and she had an unexpected Cesarean like a lot of us do, then a VBAC, and then two Cesareans, and then a VBAC. I think it’s cool that you have a VBAC after multiple Cesareans and then you have a VBAC. I’m so excited for her to share her stories today, all five of them. So amazing.

Review of the Week

But of course, we have a review of the week. I’m going to share it from koggli. Sorry, I always butcher the names. The subject is “The Reason I Got My VBAC.” It says, “I cannot thank these ladies enough for the impact they had on me and my second birth. My first was a 24-hour labor with an emergency C-section. After delivering my precious son, I was sure I never wanted to go through a C-section again. Through their knowledge and resources, I was able to feel much more prepared for my second birth. Because of these ladies and all of the ones who have also shared all of their testimonies, I had a successful VBAC in October 2020 with a little girl.” She had a little boy and then she had a little girl.

“Now I am preparing for my second VBAC with another little girl due October 2022” which means at this time of recording, she just had her baby a couple of months ago. So koggli, if you are listening, please write us. Let us know how it went. It says, “Because of them, I became so passionate for VBACs and the beautiful redemption they can bring. Thank you, ladies.”

Well, thank you koggli. So excited for you. Congrats on your VBAC. I can’t wait, I hope, to hear about your second VBAC. So as usual, we love reviews from you guys. They are so amazing. They warm my heart. You can leave them in all sorts of different ways. You can do it on Apple Podcasts, Google, Instagram, and Facebook or just email us at [e-mail]. Whatever it may be, we would love to know what you think about the podcast.

Necey’s Stories

Meagan: Okay. I can’t wait. Let’s dive into your stories. Five stories. Obviously, everyone starts with a C-section, so let’s dive into that.

Necey: Okay. First, I want to say thank you for allowing me to be able to come on your podcast and share my story with you and your listeners. Okay, so first we’re going to talk about Joshua. He’s my firstborn. When I got pregnant with him, it was my first one. I didn’t know anything about anything.

Meagan: Right? You just don’t know what you don’t know. You know you’re going to have a baby. That’s what that pregnancy test confirms, right?

Necey: Yes, yes. I just didn’t take good care of myself. I was eating. I was just happy to be pregnant so I took it as an excuse to eat whatever I wanted. I gained a lot of weight rapidly. Around 7 months, I ended up getting diagnosed with gestational diabetes. That made me have to go to the doctor more often, sometimes twice a week, and get a lot of non-stress tests. I didn’t know what I was doing or what the tests were for.

So then at around 37 weeks, I went in and got a non-stress test done. I didn’t pass it. They said that he wasn’t moving the way they wanted him to move and therefore, they took me to get an ultrasound to make sure that he was still doing okay. The measured fluid and everything. The nurse ended up calling the doctor. The doctor said to have me go home and have me come back in the morning, and if it’s the same then we’ll go from there.

So fast forward, my husband and I come back the next day. Nothing changed, so they said that they were going to have to keep me at the hospital I was at because it wasn’t the original one I was supposed to be at. They said it was because it had a children’s hospital inside.

Meagan: A NICU, uh-huh.

Necey: Yes. They wanted to make sure that if there were any complications with him that we would have the option. They ended up taking me up to labor and delivery. I thought I was going to get induced, but once I got up there, and when the doctor came, my family was there and she just was like, “We’re going to do a C-section.” I was like, “Okay.”

Meagan: Oh!

Necey: Yeah. I was just like, “Okay.” We didn’t know.

Meagan: Right.

Necey: I heard the nurse ask her, “You’re not going to induce her? You’re just going to give her a C-section?” The doctor was like, “Yeah. Just going to give her a C-section.” I didn’t know. I was just like, “Okay.” So I did the C-section and everything went good, no complications. As she was pulling him out, she said, “Oh, that’s what happened. The cord was wrapped tightly around his neck.” I now know that just because the cord is wrapped around the neck doesn’t mean that you cannot deliver your baby vaginally.

Meagan: Correct, yeah. It actually happens all of the time. Babies come out with nuchal cords all of the time.

Necey: Yeah. So you know, I was just like, “Okay.” I was just happy that my baby was born. He was born 6 pounds, 11 ounces I believe via C-section. Everything went good. I was just happy to be a first-time mom.

So for my second pregnancy/baby, I had another son, Reggie the Third. He was actually a successful VBAC. The pregnancy was fine. No complications and no gestational diabetes which I was happy about that. Everything was fine. I actually went into early labor with him on Thanksgiving Day.

Meagan: Oh, a turkey baby.

Necey: Yes. I guess it was all of the food. And then so I actually was going some Black Friday shopping because I never had labor before. My husband and I were at the store and I kept going back and forth to the bathroom. I was just telling him, “I don’t know. It keeps feeling like I have to go to the bathroom but nothing is happening. It’s kind of weird.” He was just like, “Okay.” So one time when I was going back to him, I ended up having a contraction that stopped me in my tracks. I was like, “Wait a minute. Is this possible? Oh, a contraction.” So I was like, “Okay. Oh, Lord. Just let me make it through this so I can get back to him because I don’t know what’s going on.”

I made it back to him and I was like, “I think we need to go home because I feel like I may be having contractions.” He was just like, “Okay.” So I got home, called the exchange line, and told them what was going on. They wanted me to go on and get checked out. I did and I went about midnight. They let me go at about 8:00 in the morning and said I was contracting. I just didn’t have any change.

I went home and relaxed. At around 6:00, so that was Thursday, then Friday around 6:00, I started to have contractions. I was like, “Wait a minute. It’s time now.” So I had my sister and my sister-in-law, so family over. I ended up on all fours making this moaning sound. My sister is on the phone calling my doctor. My sister-in-law is massaging my back and she was like, “I’m almost sure you’re in labor.”

So they said to go back and I went back. They checked me and I was about 4-5 centimeters dilated. So they said, “Yeah, you’re in labor.” Active labor is what they called it. I immediately asked for an epidural. I didn’t even try to labor. I was like, “Give it to me. I want it now.”

Meagan: Yeah, that’s okay.

Necey: Although I had the epidural, for some reason, I still felt my son. He felt like he was coming out of me. Some hours had passed, maybe about 8 or 9 hours or so, but before that, the nurse ended up checking me and she was like, “You’re complete. I just have to wait until the doctor comes.” She called the doctor and I was like, “I think I feel him.” She was like, “Oh, I just checked you. You’re good. You’re complete. You’ve got time,” is what she said. She had me do some practice pushes and as they had my legs open, my mom and my mother-in-law were like, “Oh, I think you need to close your legs.”

Meagan: I thought I had time.

Necey: Right? I was like, “Okay, why? He’s right there, isn’t he?” She was like, “Yeah.” So then the doctor ended up coming. Actually, I had a resident. He ended up coming in and the doctor soon followed. I didn’t even get to push. I pushed a time and a half. I didn’t even get to push hard or anything. He just came right out. I think my body had already done it for me, just unaware that that’s what it was doing. He was born 6 pounds, 14 ounces.

Meagan: Okay.

Necey: Yes, so I’m in the 6-pound range. So yeah.

Then for my third baby, Miss Addison, my first baby girl, the same thing. No gestational diabetes. The pregnancy was actually good. We were on track for another VBAC, but around 40 weeks, I went in for my check-up and the doctor was just like, “I wonder why you haven’t gone into labor.” I was actually thinking the same thing. So she said to follow her to the ultrasound room. I did and she did a quick check to examine and she was like, “Oh, that’s what’s going on. She’s transverse inside of you.”

Meagan: Sideways.

Necey: Yeah. I had no clue what that meant. I was just like, “Okay, transverse.” I’ve heard of breech or head-down. She told me to come back the next day and do an EVC.

Meagan: ECV.

Necey: ECV, I’m sorry.

Meagan: It’s a version where they are trying to manually, from the outside, rotate the baby.

Necey: Yes. She said if that was successful, then good. If not, we would have to do another C-section. So of course, it wasn’t successful and I didn’t know anything about Spinning Babies or anything like that because I probably would have tried some of those things, but yes. We ended up going for a C-section, got prepped, and for some reason, when they got me to the operating room, I became very panicked. I started shouting and asking them to get me up. I didn’t want to do it. The whole team lifted me up and the doctor talked to me. She calmed me down. We went on with the C-section. Everything went good. She was actually 8 pounds even.

Meagan: A big jump, about a pound heavier than your other babies.

Necey: Yes, so I don’t know how or why, but that’s what it was.

So for my next pregnancy/birth, it was my daughter Madeline. Her pregnancy was good too with no complications and no gestational diabetes again. However, I was still with the same provider, so since I had two Cesareans, she said she wasn’t comfortable with doing a vaginal because I actually unknowingly started to advocate for myself with her. I just asked. I asked and asked. She always told me no, so I was just like, “Okay.” I didn’t think I had another choice, but I did try to compromise with her.

I was like, “If I go into labor before the scheduled date, can I just have her vaginally or try it out?” She was like, “I guess. I really don’t want to do it, but maybe so.” I didn’t go into labor though. So I went to the scheduled Cesarean and I think for my last birth, I had trauma so I was just scared. I started to panic again. This time, it was before we got into the operating room. It was right after they gave me the spinal tap. It was so bad. It was really bad. I was a little embarrassed, but they ended up saying that they had to give me some medicine. They ended up giving me Xanax. I was scared because they said it was not good for the baby. It messes with the baby’s heart. They were like, “We really don’t have another option because we really need you calm.” So I just agreed.

But after I got that, I didn’t even know what it was, but I was really relaxed. I didn’t have a care in the world. We did the C-section and Madeline was born. She was 6 pounds, 12 ounces.

Meagan: Okay.

Necey: I know. So I don’t know. But yeah. It was good and no complications, just the panic attack. Oh, and you know what? Yes. My husband did say that she didn’t respond. I didn’t know because I was out of it. And so he said that he got scared because she didn’t respond for a while. I’m just assuming it was because of the medicine, but she was fine. I just thank God that she was okay.

I was very depressed after that. I think it was a trauma for me, so I didn’t want to have any more babies. I didn’t want to go through the delivery process or any of that. I ended up getting pregnant again.

Meagan: Oops, someone else had a plan for you.

Necey: Yep. So with this pregnancy and birth, I knew deep inside that I didn’t want to do it, but I was okay with having another C-section. I wasn’t looking to be pregnant. It was actually at the end of the COVID lockdown, so I have all of these friends and I see people having these babies and I tell my husband, “We missed the wave. We did good.” And then nope, we got caught right up in the wave.

So yeah. Her story is a journey for me. I didn’t realize I had trauma with the rest of the other two births before her. One day while I was minding my business and having some alone time, I heard the Holy Spirit tell me that I was pregnant, that I was going to have my baby vaginally, that I needed to call my sister to have her bring me some pregnancy tests, and that this is going to be a faith entrenched journey between me and God.

Meagan: That just gave me the chills.

Necey: I’m telling you, I was scared. I thought I was tripping. I said, “No, I am not,” but I decided to be obedient, so I called my sister. She came over with three pregnancy tests and sure enough, every single one of them was positive.

Meagan: Pregnant!

Necey: My husband and I were like, “How did this happen?” We thought we were doing good, but when God has other plans for us, His plan always trumps what we want to do. I remember my friend telling me that she ended up not going to doctors anymore. She ended up doing midwives. She told me that they had done research that the midwives are saying that there is more research out saying that it’s possible for people to have vaginal births after multiple Cesareans.

Meagan: At this point, you’ve had three technically, right? You’ve had a vaginal birth in between, but you’ve had three.

Necey: Yes. I had three. I called the midwifery info she gave to me. They said no. They said maybe if it would have been one that they would be able to do it, but they gave me the information for somebody else. I called them. They said no. After that, it was just a rabbit hole with a lot of no’s, so I decided to call my previous doctor although I had that trauma. I just didn’t really feel as comfortable as I did once with her. It was just familiar to me.

Meagan: Some comfort there and familiarity.

Necey: Yes. I ended up calling her and went to my appointment, but that was the last appointment I went to her because she did a couple of things that I feel like as a provider, you just shouldn’t do even as a person. It’s like she was passively trying to get me to get a tubal done.

Meagan: Oh.

Necey: Yes. She was like, “I need to know if you want to get a tubal or not because I need to schedule your C-section at a different hospital so we can do it all at the same time.” I was like, “Okay.” I didn’t say anything to her. I didn’t plan on getting one, but even if I did or didn’t, I didn’t say anything. I actually wanted to talk to her about having my baby vaginally.

Meagan: Right, yeah.

Necey: That was a red flag and I just said, “Okay.” Then the second thing was that she asked me about the routine testing that most doctors do which is fine. I didn’t have a problem with it. It’s just that she started to say because I told her that I didn’t know. I would tell her at the next visit. She was just like, “Well, the sooner the better in case your baby has any disabilities and you want to terminate your pregnancy.”

Meagan: Oh, whoa.

Necey: Yes. I was shocked because I couldn’t believe she had said that to me. But for me, if that’s what God wanted to bless me with a baby with disabilities, I’m okay with that because I’m going to do what I need to do. I just thought that was kind of out of line that she would do that. It hurt my feelings a little bit, but I was like, “Okay. This is the only choice I have.” The third thing was after we were wrapping up and she was leaving out, she said in a low tone but I could hear her clearly, she was like, “Well, thanks for keeping us in business.”

I was like, “Okay. Have a good day.”

Meagan: Maybe a little unprofessional.

Necey: Yeah. But I had been with her since my second birth and my second pregnancy, so that was just new for me. I decided I wasn’t going to go back to her. That was in January. I found out I was pregnant in November, so from the beginning of January to the end of February, I didn’t have a doctor. I’m calling. I actually wrote a letter to one of the head obstetricians in my area of a big institution where I’m from. She actually called me back. That phone call had me in tears because he basically was laughing at me literally and telling me that it is a joke. No institution here would ever–

Meagan: He went out of his way to call you back to tell you that you are a joke.

Necey: Yes, that, “No institution in our area or anywhere is going to allow TOLAC after three Cesareans.” I was just like, “Okay, God. Why would you tell me this? Why would you have me go down this road if it’s not true? This is impossible. Nobody is going to let me do this.” After I went on my rant, I was just like, “Whatever.” I just kept going. I kept on and ended up finding a doctor who ended up giving me a referral to a high-risk clinic here.

But in between that time, I ended up hiring a doula. I suggest anybody that’s pregnant, get a doula if you can. I ended up joining some Facebook groups and following people on Instagram. It’s where I found you guys, The VBAC Link Community and it was so encouraging for me just to know that I wasn’t alone. There are people out there who are going through the same things.

I ended up going to the high-risk clinic and they told me that they were going to accept me as a patient. Of course, they told me all of the cons of TOLACing after three Cesareans. They said that they suggested that I get a repeat C-section. I told them that I didn’t want to do it, but this was the first time that I understood that even if I didn’t want to do it and someone forced me to it, they said that it was assault. I said, “Is it?” They were like, “Yeah. If you don’t consent to it, we can’t do that.” I was like, “Oh. Okay.”

But yeah, so to her birth. My water ended up breaking. I did want to say that they told me they would absolutely not induce me. No Pitocin. I had done a little research, so I knew that. They said that Pitocin can increase uterine rupture rates or the percentage of it, so I wanted to stay away from it. They had told me that.

That Wednesday, fast forward to my labor and birth with her, my water broke at 1:00 AM on Wednesday. I never had experienced that before, so I’m like, “I think that’s what it is,” because it kept coming out in gushes. I had a doctor’s appointment Thursday morning, so I tried to do some walking to try to get things moving because I wasn’t contracting. I didn’t feel anything.

I went to the doctor Thursday morning and told them what had happened. Of course, they wanted me to go to triage and get checked out to get the test done to make sure that it was actually my water. We went home. We didn’t go back right away. We waited a long time. We went back at 11:00 at night, got the test done, and it was my water.

I had to be admitted and I was scared, but I knew the word that I had so I held on to it. We got upstairs and the first resident that came in was really forceful and was like, “You have to sign this paper saying that you are declining the C-section.” We were like, “Okay. Can you give us a second?”

The nurse that we had was really, really good, the first nurse. Both nurses. She talked to me. She consoled me. She explained things further than what the resident was saying. My husband and I ended up signing the paper, but I still had no change. My water was ruptured.

Meagan: Were you contracting? Okay, yeah. Just ruptured, but nothing happening yet.

Necey: Yes ma’am. They ended up telling me that I had to get induced.

Meagan: You’re like, “But they said they wouldn’t.”

Necey: Yes. So my husband and I were scared. I was like, “I don’t know about that. I thought you guys said I wasn’t going to be able to do that.” They were like, “Basically, your options are to get Pitocin or have a repeat C-section.” The nurse was really nice. We asked her if we could take a second to just pray and talk among ourselves. She was like, “Okay,” but she stayed there. She didn’t leave.

Meagan: Amongst ourselves like him and I and a doula.

Necey: Yes. Yes. So we looked at each other and that’s what we kind of said. She was like, “Oh, well I wanted to pray with you guys.” Yeah. It was so shocking. I wasn’t expecting it. We said, “Okay.” After she prayed, the atmosphere just changed. I was like, “You know what?” I’m taking this hospital gown off. I brought my own gown. I’m putting that on. I had the affirmation vision board that I had made. I pulled that out. I turned off the lights. We brought LED light candles and lit the room up and put on our worship music and just went in. I’m like, “You did something there,” talking to the nurse.

They started me on Pitocin. I told them I wanted to start at 0.5. They said they don’t usually do that. They usually start around 2. I told them I was scared and that I would rather start off low and work my way up. They ended up saying, “Okay.”

Meagan: Good for you.

Necey: So then the doula ended up getting there. This was around 3:00 PM. She was there and I started contracting. They put in an internal fetal monitor, I think is what it’s called.

Meagan: An FSC or an IUPC. A lot of times with VBAC or TOLAC, they put this IUPC monitor in to tell them exactly the strength of the contractions so they can manipulate the Pitocin. The FSC is the little probe monitor that goes on the baby’s head to tell them exactly what the heart rate is.

Necey: Yeah, they put the one–

Meagan: IUPC, intrauterine pressure catheter is what it’s called.

Necey: Okay, you got it. But yeah, so they did that. Between 3:00 and I would say around 10:00ish, I was still just at a 3. The contractions were getting stronger and they didn’t want to check me often because my waters were broken. They didn’t want to introduce infection. I was, is it B strep positive?

Meagan: Group B strep, GBS?

Necey: Yes, yes. I was positive for that.

Meagan: So they probably wanted to do antibiotics.

Necey: Yes, so all of that is going on and then the shift changed and the other nurse came in. She was just like, “Okay. I just took these classes. I want to put you in all of these positions.” She and my doula had me, I don’t know what the position was but they had me laying on the bed and I had to arch my back and they had the birthing ball in between my legs.

Meagan: That’s Walcher’s. Oh, arch your back laying on your side?

Necey: Yes, that’s exactly what it is.

Meagan: Oh, okay okay. Like a Sims position, like a side-lying position?

Necey: I was calling it swimming.

Meagan: Sims, yeah. Exaggerated probably. Or there’s the flying cowgirl where you are really, really arched.

Necey: I think I may have done that one too. They were on it. I had no clue. I was just doing what they told me to do. All I knew was that I was feeling contractions. I started going back and forth to the bathroom. I ended up throwing up. It was unmedicated for me too. We didn’t find out the gender. It was a surprise for us. We thought that the journey was more important than that at that point.

At about 10:45ish, the nurse and my doula were like, “I really believe that you are in transition,” because I was making these weird noises.

Meagan: Isn’t it funny how our body just intuitively makes weird noises but at the same time, we’re like, “Oh wait. That’s a good noise.”

Necey: My doula said, after it was over, she looked at me and she was like, “I have never in my life heard anything like that.” We all laughed about it at that point, but yeah. For some reason, the resident doctor that was there would not let the nurse check me. I don’t know why, but the nurse kept asking and was like, “I really just think she’s ready.” I don’t know. It was just taking the doctor a really long time, but she finally got there. She comes and she was ready to check me. I was like, “Wait. You have to wait. Here comes a contraction.” The contraction comes and I’m like, “Okay. It’s over. Check me now. Let’s move fast.” She did. I was complete.

They were like, “Okay. Get ready. We’re going to do a couple of practice pushes and get things going.” They were like, “Whatever position you want.” I ended up on the bed in the weirdest sideways– it was just really weird. They were like, “Okay, if that’s what you want to do.” I’m like, “Okay, I guess.”

Meagan: That’s what my body is doing, yeah.

Necey: The room quickly filled up with people. I pushed two times and I ended up yelling out, “It burns,” because it burned.

Meagan: Uh-huh, the ring of fire.

Necey: Yes, that’s what they said. They chuckled and they were like, “Yeah, that’s the ring of fire. That’s supposed to happen.” My husband was all, “I see the head.” I’m like, “Oh, it’s happening!” Then I pushed again and I mean, she popped out. We didn’t get it on camera. We videoed the whole thing, but my husband, I guess, got so excited. He snatched the camera from the doula and accidentally cut it off, so we missed her actually coming out.

Meagan: Darn it!

Necey: I know. I couldn’t be mad though. He was excited. She was born. Hannah Faith, 6 pounds, 5 ounces. She came out. He was screaming, “You did it. God did it, honey.” I’m like, “Yeah, God did it.” Everybody in there was in awe. The doctor– I even asked. I said, “Has anybody in here ever witnessed a vaginal birth after three Cesareans?” and everybody said no. This was amazing.

And so she was born. I’m happy she was born. I didn’t realize just how much I needed to have a healing birth, this faith journey with God and me, and just the information I learned about giving birth. It only took five, but–

Meagan: But hey, you learned and grew with each one.

Necey: Yes ma’am. Yeah. So that’s it. My babies. But that’s why her name is Hannah Faith.

Meagan: That’s so beautiful.

Necey: Thank you. It was our journey. We didn’t even have a name picked out either.

Meagan: It just came. Everything fit just perfectly.

Necey: Yes.

Meagan: Yes. And do you know what? Something that you did for all of those providers that were there, is you proved to them, and not that you were there to prove anything, but you proved to them and showed them that it’s possible because I guarantee before that, they were probably all a little doubtful and a little skeptical, right?

But there it goes. It happens. The hardest thing with VBAC after– so from VBAC after two Cesareans, ACOG is like, “Okay. Vaginal birth after two Cesareans is reasonable. We feel like it’s okay. We know that the rupture rate is anywhere between .2-1.5% depending on the study.” But then VBAC after three Cesareans, there’s not a lot out there and it’s because we’re not doing them and providers are cutting people off saying, “Nope. You had those two. You’re done.” But then we’ve had story after story after story of VBAC after three Cesareans where they’re beautiful and they pan out.

Look, you had Pitocin. Do you know what your Pitocin got to?

Necey: 5.

Meagan: A 5. See? You had Pitocin and you had an IUPC. I want to talk a little bit about that because sometimes, it’s a less-ideal thing because it’s an intervention, right? But sometimes, a provider may agree to allow a VBAC after multiple Cesareans. If you’re feeling stuck and there’s no one in your area and it’s a rule, you could talk to them and say, “Let’s have this. Let’s watch what my contractions are doing. I’m willing to have this intervention for this birth. I never want to say to give in to anything, but it’s just an option because it sometimes brings comfort to those providers and I guarantee that that’s what it did.

In the beginning, they were like, “No, you can’t have Pit,” and then it was like they totally forgot that they said that. So they were saying one thing and doing another. That happens a lot of the time, so you are just living proof, right? VBAC after three Cesareans with an induction. I mean, yes you went into spontaneous labor. Your membranes ruptured spontaneously, but then labor didn’t start. It probably would have in time, but they jump-started it. They jump-started it with Pit, so it’s possible. It is possible.

There are not enough studies out there because it’s not happening.

Necey: It’s not. That’s actually a goal of mine to just advocate and give a voice to the problem. Maybe the issue is the fact that we are being denied and the proper research isn’t given because during my research, YouTube, The VBAC Link Community, and others, I saw multiple women having vaginal births after two, three, and I even saw four. If we could get across the board and get a good average and a good study was done, then maybe we can move forward.

Meagan: Right, it’s just getting the person and getting the connections to start back. It’s going to start with people just like us, just regular old humans. It’s going to start with us facilitating this. We have our Dr. Natalie Elphinstone, I think is how she says it, she is doing maternal assisted Cesareans which is something also very foreign and not heard of. Everyone is like, “No, that’s not possible,” and here it is and it’s happening. As each of us starts implementing things, maybe it takes writing these providers like you did. It is unfortunate that they called just to laugh at you and say, “Yeah, right.” Maybe write back and say, “I just wanted to let you know that this happened.”

Necey: That’s what my doula said to do. I haven’t done it yet. I actually had forgotten and I think I should too.

Meagan: Yes. It’s just that every little thing. I wanted to write a note to my doctor too because he was like, “Good luck. No one’s going to want you out there.” I remember yelling. I’m holding my baby and should be not thinking about my doctor, but that’s exactly where my mind went. I was like, “Screw you. Look at what I just did. This happened. You told me this wouldn’t happen. You told me I would never get a baby out of my pelvis because it was so small.”

Yeah. It just goes to show that one, we are capable of amazing things. Our bodies are incredible. God is good and it’s okay. It’s okay. It’s not like you’re shoving his face in it and saying, “Oh, look at this,” but it’s like, “Hey. I want you to know that this happened. I even had Pitocin.” And then he might look at it and scoff and say, “Whatever,” or he might be like, “Hmm. All right. Maybe I shouldn’t doubt.”

Necey: That’s the biggest thing. It is possible. It just goes to show that we are all human, even doctors. It’s not to discredit them at all, but nobody knows everything and we should work together as a birthing team and not as an enforcer and just the patient. This should be a collective thing. I think a lot more can get done if it goes that route.

Having a doula is very important during pregnancy, delivery, and postpartum. My doula came a week later to do the postpartum visit and she asked me how I was feeling. I was fine and she was just like, “Well, how are your feet?” I was like, “Well, they seem like they are a little bit swollen.” She was like, “I think you should check your blood pressure because there is such a thing as postpartum hypertension.” I said, “Okay.” I checked it and my blood pressure was really, really high, almost stroke level high.

She said, “You need to go to the emergency room now.” I’m just thankful that we had the doula because I probably would have just gone on. I was feeling fine. I ended up going. I had to stay. They had to put me on magnesium and some other things for a couple of days. They sent me home with some medicine, but everything ended up fine after that, but I just want people to be aware that postpartum is care too and there are those signs.

Meagan: Yes. So often, postpartum is just forgotten about. It’s hard because we are so focused on birth and pregnancy and all of these things, but then we forget about postpartum. If something is not seeming totally right, and it’s normal to have– especially if you’ve had a lot of fluids or medicines or anything like that, it’s normal to be swollen, but if you’re getting more swollen or you weren’t swollen and now all of a sudden you’re swollen, that’s definitely a sign of postpartum hypertension. It’s definitely something to call and discuss. It never hurts to just call. Even if it’s nothing, it never hurts to call and just check out.

Necey: Yes, yes.

Meagan: Thank you so much for sharing all of your stories and spending time with us.

Necey: No problem. Thank you again for having me.

Meagan: Absolutely.

Closing

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