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Welcome to our podcast! My name is Richard H. Ostler and I am a native of Salt Lake City, small business owner, married father of six with several grandchildren. I believe in and am deeply committed to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and want it to work for a wider group. I am the author of "Listen Learn and Love: Embracing LGBTQ Latter-day Saints" at Amazon (amazon.com/dp/1462135773) and Deseret Book (deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints) ...
 
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show series
 
My friend Troy Gagon (age 52, Married Father of 7, Active LDS) bravely shares his long journey to understand and solve pornography—including the effectiveness of the ACT (Acceptance, Commitment, Therapy) approach. Troy also talks about his 17-year-old son Terik who died by suicide in Feb 2015 (you can read more about Terik at http://www.terikgagon.…
 
My friend Michael Finch bravely shares his story. Michael talks about realizing at BYU that he is gay before his mission, resulting in feelings of “my life is over”. At that time, Michael ignored this realization, and he served a successful mission in New York City speaking Mandarin Chinese. Michael talks about returning home and trying to move for…
 
My friend Taylor Niebergall (active LDS, Married Mother of Two) joins us to talk about her podcast focus on building bridges between those in the Church and those who have left the Church. Taylor talks about why she started the podcast, the purpose and her hopes to build more understanding between these two groups of people. You can check out Taylo…
 
My friend Sadi Rogers (age 32, EMT, mother of 3) shares her story as a gay Latter-day Saint. Sadi talks about growing up in Arizona, realizing she has romantic feelings for women, being honest with her Bishop and eventually marrying a man. Sadi talks about the goodness of that marriage (lasted 11 years) which eventually ended. Sadi then talks about…
 
My friend Ashely Smith (Married Mother of Six, Active LDS, Mayor of Cañon City, Colorado) shares the story of raising and supporting their gay son Kyle. This podcast is based on the excellent article that Ashley wrote for LDS Living in June 2022 (https://www.ldsliving.com/what-can-you-say-when-a-family-member-comes-out-as-gay-7-ideas-from-a-latter-…
 
My friend Marie Cook (Active LDS, Age 28, Married Mother, Temple Square RM) bravely shares her story growing up in a home with a narcissistic mother. Marie discusses how she gradually realized her unhealthy upbringing and how these behaviors were becoming part of how she treated others.Following a painful breakup, Marie (with the help of friends) w…
 
My friend Isabelle Wheeler (age 23, UVU student, RM) bravely shares their journey as a nonbinary Latter-day Saint. Isabelle talks about their early life, college, serving a mission (Fort Lauderdale, FL), and their experiences following their mission. If you are nonbinary or transgender, Isabelle’s insights and experience will help you. If you are a…
 
My friend Teresa Myers (BYU grad, RM, Recently Married, Active LDS) shares her story as a bisexual Latter-day Saint. Teresa starts with difficult years (including suicidal ideation) that has a component in her sexual orientation. Teresa talks about her decision come out to others, importance of therapy and her decision to share her story to help ot…
 
My friend Taryn Hiatt, Area Director Utah/Nevada American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, joins us to talk about suicide prevention. Taryn (who has been working in this space for over 20 years after her father Terry who died by suicide in 2002) talks about the various organizations available to those considering suicide, those working to prevent…
 
My friend Christian Judd shares the story of his brother Bryan who died by suicide in April of 2010. I became aware of Christian and his good work and message around this topic with these tweets: https://twitter.com/christianmjudd/status/1513174782723846145https://twitter.com/christianmjudd/status/1513583004785917957 Dr. Judd, who is a board certif…
 
My friend Craig Jones (active LDS, married to his wife Jodi for 36 years, age 58, parents of three) joins us via Zoom from Edmonton, Canada to talk about his life-changing traumatic brain injury that occurred about ten years ago. Craig talks about being in a coma, rehab and then working to heal and move forward. Craig is full of hope and a positive…
 
My friend Chandler Rogers (New York City RM, Married, Age 24, BYU Grad) bravely shares his journey with overcoming pornography. Chandler talks about how it came into his life about 10 years ago, opening us to his Bishop and his Mother, leaving on his mission but still having slip-ups and opening up to his mission president, finishing his successful…
 
My friend Jonathan Decker (active LDS, married father of 5, licensed marriage and family therapist) joins us to share his testimony which includes how he handles complicated aspects of church history and challenging current issues. It is beautiful testimony that includes the realities of difficult issues in our Church. I became aware of Jonathan wh…
 
My friends Angela Hughey (Co-founder and President, One Community of Arizona, gay) and Michael Soto (Chief Executive Officer of Equality Arizona, transgender man) join us to talk about the LDS supported LGBTQ legislation in Mesa, Arizona that was passed in 2021. Elder Neil L. Anderson, in his April 2022 Conference Talk titled Following Jesus: Being…
 
My friend Ben Lee (Harvard Law Grad, Age 27) shares the story of feeling deep spiritual impressions to write a book during the rigors of law school to address his own journey to look inward to see pride and work to reduce pride to lift the burdens of others and find more long-term peace. Ben talks about the importance of Christ’s own example of hum…
 
My friend Devorah Stucki (graduates May 2022 in Bioinformatics at the age of 19) joins us to share her story. Devorah focus on two main parts of her story. The first part is becoming aware she is lesbian by the end of High School and the second part is her experience at BYU. Devorah talks honestly about the challenges of being queer at a BYU studen…
 
My friend, Dr. Cameron Staley who is a clinical psychologist and was on Episode 345, joins us to share new insights and tools to understand and solve pornography use. Dr. Staley (active Latter-day Saint) discusses the four main reasons some struggle with pornography use and how ACT helps reduce/solve pornography viewing. If you are working to end p…
 
My friends, Andrea Neahusan (married mother of 6) and Amber Ayres (married mother of 5) bravely share their story of sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse by their father throughout their childhood. Their father’s severe manipulation kept the sisters from talking about the abuse the whole time. It wasn’t until Andrea was 19 that she finally revealed …
 
My friends Brent Ebmeyer and Sarrah Groves join us to share some of their story including the role of the Savior in our lives. Brent and Sarrah (leaders at North Star) talk about the upcoming North Star conference—including its goals, who is invited and the role of North Star to help us come unto Christ. The theme of this year’s conference is "One …
 
My friend Ciera Clayton bravely shares her story. Ciera talks about her love of and testimony of the Church, coming out, and trying to navigate her sexuality. Ciera talks about dating women and getting married and having a son. Ciera talks about that marriage ending but being on good terms with her former wife. Ciera talks about trying to date men …
 
My friend Clark Barrow (RM, Active LDS, Age 24, Married) bravely shares his journey with self-harm. Clark (who was on episode 398 with his siblings supporting their gay father Alec) talks about returning home from his mission to Utica, New York after 9 months with a knee injury. Clark talks about the anxiety of being home and how that experience le…
 
My friend Susie White (married mother of 4, early 50’s) shares her journey with PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder) and PME (Premenstrual Exacerbation) which is very different that Premenstrual syndrome (PMS). Susie, by bravely sharing her story, helps us understand what this is; how it impacts mental health and can lead to suicidal ideation; ho…
 
My friend Brandon Galli joins us to share his remarkable story as a gay Latter-day Saint. Brandon, who grew up in Draper Utah and is 21 years-old, talks about acting on the impressions he has received that led him to come out, take a job with Disney in Florida, and then attend school at BYU-Hawaii. Brandon talks about his great parents and what the…
 
My friend Eli McCann (age 37, Ukraine RM, Lawyer, Married Skylar in 2019) shares his journey. Eli starts with the pre-mission years, his Ukraine mission (good experience), and his journey following his mission where he was forced to finally face the reality of being gay and how that looks at a Latter-day Saint. Eli shares the terror and anxiety he …
 
My friend Dr. Ryan Anderson (Ph.D., married father of 4, active LDS, was on episode 443) talking about his groundbreaking book “The Choice to Leave Abuse” which is available at Amazon (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09PGKFY59) and Deseret Book (later in April 2022). The book for local leaders, parents and individuals to recognize and then help others (…
 
My brother and friend David Ostler; Author of Bridges: Ministering to Those Who Question which is available at Deseret Book (https://deseretbook.com/p/bridges-ministering-to-those-who-question?variant_id=181882-paperback) and Amazon (https://www.amazon.com/dp/158958726X); join us to talk about a new chapter in his book. This new chapter discusses h…
 
My friend joins us via Zoom to share her story as a gay Latter-day Saint in this anonymous podcast. My friend shares her story to come out to herself, to others, to her parents on this deeply spiritual journey. She talks about the IG account she started @to_all_the_latterday_gays and the associated blog. My friend talks about how her relationship w…
 
My friend Meghan Decker joins to talk about her new book (released on April 10, 2022) called “Tender Leaves of Hope. Finding Belonging as a LGBTQ Latter-day Saint Women.” The book is at Amazon https://www.amazon.com/dp/1462143288/ (paper-back and kindle with audiobook coming soon). Meghan (my friend from High School) shared her story as a gay Latte…
 
My friend David Bingham (Age 60, Gay Latter-day Saint, Creative Director) shares his remarkable story. David talks about why he left the Church in 1980, his life outside the Church, deeply spiritual experiences, and his journey to return to the Church including receiving the Melchizedek Priesthood and his Endowment. David talks about what he has le…
 
My friend David Shill (RM Italy, 3rd-Year BYU Student, AZ native) joins us to share his story as a queer Latter-day Saint and someone who is very involved in the intersection of being at BYU as a queer student. He is co-founder of Cougar Pride Center (IG / FB @cougarpridecenter), an LGBTQ+ resource center for BYU students, and will soon be stepping…
 
My friend Clayton Rasmussen (Age 21, New York City RM) talks about figuring out his sexual orientation during Junior High and High School and then serving a mission. Clayton talks about his successful mission (including effectively using social media during Covid). Clayton talks about coming out to this mother and father after serving 18 months and…
 
My friend Adam Garrett (RM, BYU Grad, Physician Assistant, Active LDS) shares his story as a gay Latter-day Saint. Adam came out publicly in June 2021 via this FB post: https://www.facebook.com/agarrett93/posts/10220746190700360 Adam talks about what he is learning, personal revelation he is receiving, scriptures and Church leader quotes that are h…
 
My friend Alexa Norton bravely shares the story the sudden and tragic death of her father while skiing in May 2017 (https://www.serenityfhs.com/obituaries/Daryl-Norton-2/). Alexa is sharing her story to help others working through trauma and grief. Alexa shares about the actual experience, what she’s learned, validating grief, finding people that r…
 
This episode launches “Listen, Learn and Love: Improving Latter-day Saint Culture.” The book is available at Amazon amazon.com/dp/1462139566 (paperback and kindle) and Deseret Book (late March). The purpose of the book is to improve our culture so more are able to connect with and benefit from our restored doctrine—and the healing and hope it bring…
 
My friend Smith Alley braving shares his 5-year experience with pornography—why it started, why he didn’t tell anyone, and what finally helped him stop, and why he is sharing this story. Smith also helps us understand the role of our Savior and His atonement, his parents, why we need to see ourselves as enough now. Smith talks to those who are suic…
 
My friends Dr. Tyler Lefevor (Utah State Professor) and Sam Skidmore (Utah State PhD Student) join us to talk about their new research to help Ward/Stake Leaders better support their LGBTQ members. If you are interested in learning more about Tyler and Sam’s research, you can find more at www.4optionssurvey.com or www.lgbtqmormonresearch.com. Tyler…
 
My friend Jaxon George (chemistry student at Dixie State University, RM) bravely shares his story. Jaxon starts with his childhood including a brother with Spina Bifida and Lincoln logs. Jaxon then opens up about gay pornography use in his youth and realizing he is gay (Jaxon points out that pornography use didn’t make him gay). In High School, Jax…
 
My friend Dr Terryl Givens (Senior Research Fellow at Maxwell Institute at BYU) joins us to talk about his new book “The Door of Faith”. Here is a description of the book: “In The Doors of Faith, Terryl Givens teaches that the surest route to a meaningful and enduring faith is a “witting” understanding of Jesus Christ and His gospel. Givens bears a…
 
My friend Tonya Baker Miller (Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Active LDS, Married Mother of 4) joins us to share insights and principles to heal (and help others) who have experienced church/leader pain/trauma. She explores the possibility that what we often refer to as "faith crisis" could more accurately be framed as "trust crises", and talks ab…
 
My friend Alexander Solis La Torre (Worldwide Unified Co-founder, RM, active LDS, senior BYU student) joins us to share powerful and thoughtful insights on fostering belonging and creating safe spaces in our congregations. This podcast is an expanded version of the devotional Alexander gave on High Five Live: “A LONGING FOR BELONGING: Keys to Build…
 
My friend Iese Wilson (RM, Age 28, Graduating BYU-H) bravely shares his story. Iese starts with reaching out to the President of BYU-Hawaii to share his story as a gay student and the resulting positive meeting (along with others from BYU-H administration) that occurred. Iese also talks about the many closeted BYU-H students who have reached out to…
 
My friend Brooke Anderson (RM, Masters student at BYU, Author) shares her story. Brooke talks about her journey to understand and then accept her sexual orientation (which included a annulled marriage). Brooke talks about working through anger with God and the Church and why she remains a committed and believing member of the Church. She also talks…
 
My friends Brittany and Maeve Sechrist (married with three children) share their story with Maeve coming out to Brittany as transgender in July of 2021. Maeve shares feeling gender dysphoria for many years and what led her to finally come out to her wife. Brittany shares her reaction and subsequent journey to love, learn and support Maeve and how t…
 
My friend Rebecca Snedegar (Active LDS, RM, Mother) bravely shares her story of her 7 year marriage ending when her husband Ammon came out as gay. Rebecca talks about both the pain of having her marriage end and compassion for her husband (who was always faithful) as they both concluded their best paths forward were to separate. Rebecca (who remain…
 
My friend Brandon Kellogg joins us to talk about his new book “Honorably Excused” (available at Amazon https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09P8LY87Y/). Brandon talks about his own journey to serve a mission (check out Episode 266 for more of his story) and how we should create more support and understanding for Latter-day Saints who feel their path is to no…
 
My friend Justice Burt shares his story of coming out as gay in middle school (which was a generally positive experience), being atheist/agnostic during middle/school early high school, and then his journey to join the Church. It is a unique and remarkable story. Justice talks about being gay and how he originally felt that was not compatible to be…
 
My friend Taylor Kerby (active LDS, Two Masters Degrees, PhD candidate) talks about his new book called “Scrupulous: My Obsessive Compulsion for God” which is at Amazon (https://www.amazon.com/Scrupulous-My-Obsessive-Compulsion-God-ebook/dp/B09NFLLPMD). In the podcast Taylor bravely talks about his own journey with Scrupulosity discussing what it i…
 
Episode 492: Ginger Price, Resigned from Church, Positive Experience Sharing Her Journey with Stake Presidency/Bishops My friend Ginger McKnight Price (married mother of four, RM) shares her journey with serving a mission (good experience) and then the events that led her to resign from the Church in 2018. Ginger is open, vulnerable and honest. She…
 
My friend Dr. Lacey (she/her; married mother of two) shares her story as a queer Latter-day Saint. Lacey talks about growing up as a Latter-day Saint and remaining a practicing member of the Church, following her impressions to change her career path (which includes getting a masters degree and PhD in marriage and family therapy), finding her husba…
 
My friend Jackson Jensen (age 22, RM from Lubbock Texas) shares his story. Jackson starts bravely sharing his story being a survivor of sexual abuse at age 8. Jackson, with a prompting from the Spirit, at age 16 told his family about his sexual abuse and how freeing and helpful it was to finally open up about this traumatic experience. Concurrent w…
 
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